A side dish of bacon.

Teppic backed away from a slashing paw. 'Hold on, hold on,’ he said. 'What do you mean, a man?’

'It’s easy,’ said the Sphinx. 'A baby crawls in the morning, stands on both legs at noon, and at evening an old man walks with a stick. Good, isn’t it?’

Teppic bit his lip. 'We’re talking about one day here?’ he said doubtfully.

There was a long, embarrassing silence.

'It’s a wossname, a figure of speech,’ said the Sphinx irritably, making another lunge.

'No, no, look, wait a minute,’ said Teppic. 'I’d like us to be very clear about this, right? I mean, it’s only fair, right?’

'Nothing wrong with the riddle,’ said the Sphinx. 'Damn good riddle. Had that riddle for fifty years, sphinx and cub.’ It thought about this. 'Chick,’ it corrected.

'It’s a good riddle,’ Teppic said soothingly. 'Very deep. Very moving. The whole human condition in a nutshell. But you’ve got to admit, this doesn’t all happen to one individual in one day, does it?’

'Well. No,’ the Sphinx admitted. 'But that is self-evident from the context. An element of dramatic analogy is present in all riddles,’ it added, with the air of one who had heard the phrase a long time ago and rather liked it, although not to the extent of failing to eat the originator.

'Yes, but,’ said Teppic crouching down and brushing a clear space on the damp sand, 'is there internal consistency within the metaphor? Let’s say for example that the average life expectancy is seventy years, okay?’

'Okay,’ said the Sphinx, in the uncertain tones of someone who has let the salesman in and is now regretfully contemplating a future in which they are undoubtedly going to buy life insurance.

'Right. Good. So noon would be age 35, am I right? Now considering that most children can toddle at a year or so, the four legs reference is really unsuitable, wouldn’t you agree? I mean, most of the morning is spent on two legs. According to your analogy’ he paused and did a few calculations with a convenient thighbone- 'only about twenty minutes immediately after 00.00 hours, half an hour tops, is spent on four legs. Am I right? Be fair.’

'Well-’ said the Sphinx.

'By the same token you wouldn’t be using a stick by six p.m. because you’d be only, er, 52,’ said Teppic, scribbling furiously. 'In fact you wouldn’t really be looking at any kind of walking aid until at least half past nine, I think. That’s on the assumption that the entire lifespan takes place over one day which is, I believe I have already pointed out, ridiculous. I’m sorry, it’s basically okay, but it doesn’t work.’

'Well,’ said the Sphinx, but irritably this time, 'I don’t see what I can do about it. I haven’t got any more. It’s the only one I’ve ever needed.’

'You just need to alter it a bit, that’s all.’

'How do you mean?’

'Just make it a bit more realistic.’

'Hmm.’ The Sphinx scratched its mane with a claw.

'Okay,’ it said doubtfully. 'I suppose I could ask: What is it that walks on four legs—’

'Metaphorically speaking,’ said Teppic.

'Four legs, metaphorically speaking,’ the Sphinx agreed, 'for about—’

'Twenty minutes, I think we agreed.’

'Okay, fine, twenty minutes in the morning, on two legs—‘

'But I think calling it in “the morning” is stretching it a bit,’ said Teppic. 'It’s just after midnight. I mean, technically it’s the morning, but in a very real sense it’s still last night, what do you think?’

A look of glazed panic crossed the Sphinx’s face.

'What do you think?’ it managed.

'Let’s just see where we’ve got to, shall we? What, metaphorically speaking, walks on four legs just after midnight, on two legs for most of the day—’

'Barring accidents,’ said the Sphinx, pathetically eager to show that it was making a contribution.

'Fine, on two legs barring accidents, until at least suppertime, when it walks with three legs—’

'I’ve known people use two walking sticks,’ said the Sphinx helpfully.

'Okay. How about: when it continues to walk on two legs or with any prosthetic aids of its choice?’

The Sphinx gave this some consideration.

'Ye-ess,’ it said gravely. 'That seems to fit all eventualities.’

Basically, Mr grifter announced that he might be getting into the collecting side of yugioh, which would lead to the scalping hell that now plagues the Pokémon and One Piece TCGs

As a joke, MBTYugioh gave them pointers on what to “invest in”, recommending some of the WORST shit products that this game released in the years

He then followed up with a tongue-in-cheek, clearly trolling video recommending shit like Legendary Duelists sets, Duelist of Deep and Synchro Storm, and the Platinum cards, and exclusive COINS before ending the video with “Don’t invest in yugioh. You will lose money due to this game’s reprint policies”

Like, it was very obvious for anyone with half-a-brain cell and is familiar with Yugioh that the video is a joke

BUT a bunch of scalping bots took the video at face value and bought out these doodoo, worthless products immediately after his fuckass video came out

someone else shaves the barber (that would make the barber someone who does not shave themself, which would mean the barber shaves them)

the barber shaves themself (this would make the barber someone who shaves themself, which would mean they aren't shaved by the barber)

the barber is shaved by a different barber (a different barber still counts as a person.)

the barber is shaved by a razor and not a person (if this counts as not shaving themself then nobody in this town is being shaved by the barber and this does not actually fit any part of the scenario described)

the barber is a woman (women actually count as people so she still needs to be shaved)

the barber is bald (bald people are people too.)