send me asks to entertain me. NSFW sideblog, 25, it/its, trans girl, poly and bi, domme. ace both as in good at it and as in asexual 55 temptations towards evil
welcome to my horny sideblog! I'm here to write about things I'm horny about, and in the process of that get better at writing. There's a pipe dream where someday I make money off writing about kink.
I'm a dom leaning switch, I post about sadism, hypnosis, tf, snuff, training, and probably a few other things.
I have a ko-fi. Partner talked me into making it as I am in fairly desperate need of money. Sorry if my posts about that are annoying, I am still figuring shit out.
and also, I have a patreon now! Support me, and over time I intend to add more exclusive content (though there is a bit there now), as well as use it as a space to rough draft my longer works, and help decide what to create in the future.
writing
Below the cut, notes on comfort levels and interactions.
I am a trans woman, I'm bi but primarily interested in girlthings, which means that my content is primarily understood as f/f. however, i generally keep gender out of my posts, in large part because i have a few mlm friends into hypno that i have a huge amount of respect for, and i'd like to think that my kink posts can be enjoyed by them as well. but, uh, please do not imply that i'm a man in the tags. that makes me viscerally uncomfortable. Additionally, I'm not really here to flirt (except with my mutuals...) but like feel free to dm me to compliment my writing understanding that if I get flirt-y vibes I'm likely to back off. I am polysaturated and am not looking for new subs.
I like receiving asks. I like getting attention. But at this point I have received so much unsolicited flirting that if you spook me I'm liable to run. Additionally, like, I don't answer 90% of the asks I receive. I just don't have the time nor energy. A lot of the asks I most enjoy I can't respond to because the vibe just isn't right. C'est la vie.
In terms of specific discomforts and the types of interactions I like: I love hearing that my work strikes a spark in you. I love hearing that you've discovered something about yourself from my stuff. I love hearing that you're learning new things from my stuff. I really, really love hearing that my stuff led to you participating in kink, either leading a scene or joining a scene. Genuinely a major hope with this blog is getting more of y'all into kink.
But like, for ace reasons, I don't like hearing about your orgasms or personal sexual activities!! I'm totally fine hearing you describe how strong your emotions are or tell me how lost in the fantasy you are but the moment anything gets to physical descriptions it makes me very uncomfortable!
Finally. I might be repeating myself. But please do not treat me as your domme. I am not your dominant. I am not your miss, I am not your mommy, I am not your mistress, I am not your trainer. You do not have the right to call me by those titles. Yes, this is a kink setting, but I am not even aspirationally your dom. To you, I am merely Alice. Do not request or expect flirting from me, I do not owe that to you. Do not dm me asking to play out a scene or assuming that you submission is desired. Please. This is getting exhausting.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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as a noted camera pervert, the idea of giving a girl a trigger to get just a little fuzzier, or drop just a little deeper, when she hears the nice heavy *click* of the mechanical shutter is a really nice one that I think about from time to time.
every once in a while i remember the body transfer illusion and think about how hot it'd be to incorporate that kind of thing into a twinning scene. ideally both of you should be moving and perceiving yourselves so similarly that if i hurt one of you both of you should feel it.
i really resonate with your post about "real love." I don't really know how serious you take it and it doesn't seem much like your other posts but I think about it constantly. I think you ought to be poet, really. Some people in the notes seemed to take it as a sort of romantic post, which I can't be sure of your intentions, but I think that's a bad reading of it. I've had this strange and horrible relationship with this person for quite a few months and it feels exactly like that. Just awful. I've had a lot of those really. And everyone talks about love and how it feels and what it does. I don't think that gets to happen to me. I cannot stress enough how often I think about that post. Especially the first and last lines. It really means a lot to me. I can imagine you must have been going through something as well when you wrote it. I'm sorry, I'm sure this isn't a usual ask for you, and I'm sorry if I've misinterpreted you. It just occupies such a large space in my mind.
Broadly I think I probably take my posting more seriously than I should. Mmm. Idk. I don't like "director's commentary" or "word of god" or any version of that kind of thing that purports to give a 'correct' interpretation. I think that it's artistically dubious to ever claim a 'correct' reading of such a thing, and thus I don't want to endorse anything in that way. The line between 'horny' and 'scary' and 'funny' isn't for me to draw, especially when I'm interested in blurring it.
But, when I wrote it, I certainly had your kind of read in mind. Or, more precisely. A part of writing it was out of frustration towards that kind of "well your abusive relationship wasn't *real* love" type stuff. I think that's pretty obvious in the post. As well it was a further meditation on my various "aro kink"-esque loveplay posts. Why must we view 'love' as always good? Why must we worship at love's altar?
I'm broadly interested in that kind of non-normative view of love. I mean, I have an unusual relationship with 'emotions' in general, not just because of my sadism. Thus I'm broadly inclined to dislike such notions of 'love' as 'necessarily positive'. It's just a feeling. It is shaped by the world much more than the world is shaped by it. It is socially mediated. It is not 'real', and on some level I seek to destroy it by understanding it.
Anyway. Based on the two other anons you sent, you were pretty worried about sending this. I actually really like receiving asks like this. Maybe my favorite kind of anon to receive. This type of 'explaining why a post hit true and had a personal impact' always makes me really happy, though I don't know if it's always really earned. I tend to think I'm still a novice as a writer, though my patreon supports my efforts to improve. If you want to see more of my writing and thoughts, I think I write more there than here these days.
But, I'm glad I can have that kind of impact, and I wish you luck on your journey!
Sorry, I know you said your parents or partners were abusive and did terrible things to you in the name of love. But I just need you to know that they did that because they thought they were feeling love, but what they were feeling for you wasn't real love, okay? And the real problem here is clearly that people don't agree with my personal idealized vision of what love is. So you need to listen to me. Real love is a good thing for everyone involved. okay? Real love is overwhelming. Real love is found in the scent of her clothing that you stole from her hamper when she wasn't in the room. Real love is when you look up someone else's username to find their old accounts when they were less good at opsec. Real love is global positioning systems and chains and zipties and drugs that dissolve in drinks. Real love sometimes feels disgusting and makes you throw up when you think about it but that's because you weren't embracing it enough. Real love is an intrusion in your mind by something that feels external that empties you out and replaces you with something better. Real love is the red dripping from scratches she left in you. Real love leaves you hollowed out and crying yourself to sleep because you lost the only thing that made you feel it. Real love is scheming and planning and plotting to make things better. Okay?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i like when im looking at non-pervert art and a character randomly has spiral eyes because i get to pretend this isnt her real personality and actually she's being hypnotized to do all of that.
Going easy on a new or less experienced player at a game in order to make them have a better time does kinda turn me on. Gently guiding you towards achieving a climactic victory against me. Upon my defeat I reveal my hand to show you that I had nothing at all, that it was truly all you (having previously subtly discarded all my outs). You dance victoriously kicking and shouting. Unaware that I'm looking down on you from above, twisting my marionette piloting a little figure to play out cleaning up and bemoaning my loss. All the while i grin and watch you with hungry eyes, tasting your false victory and beckoning you in ever deeper. Keep playing, come closer, I have more things to show you. You'll have so much fun here with me. Ignore how perfectly everything lines up, don't mind the strings that hunt your limbs, you have nothing to fear in joining my performance.
It's really hard having mystic eyes of mind control but also being autistic and committed to solidarity. Like, I want you to look into my eyes so I can mind control you into being my toy forever and ever. But I don't want to like say shit like "look at my eyes when I'm speaking to you" or otherwise make allusion to such systems of power. That'd make me uncomfortable, too, and no one wants to be uncomfortable when you're about to scoop someone's personality out like microwaved ice cream. Anyway, this leads to a lot of really long and meandering conversations, but usually we get there eventually.
and if that description was truly accurate then you'd stop calling it the brainwashing chair while we have guests over that haven't sat in the chair yet.
Developing a classification of kink dynamic called Abuser/Victim where we get rid of all the redeemable traits that can be used to justify your enjoyment and only allow comfort that gives you a sinking feeling in your stomach.
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I do appreciate how natural "it's hot so you need to take your clothes off" is as a suggestion. Temperature based sensory suggestion is broadly quite easy to do. And the sleight of hand to make you not realize that 'taking your clothes off' is contextually considered pervert behavior is similarly simple. So it's a very aesthetically pleasing space to me, in a mathematical sense as well as in other senses.
"Attribute theft" is probably one of the gimmickiest things I find hot. The framing of things as being 'stolen' does in fact make most things hotter. And my endless enjoyment for abstract bullshit synergizes quite well. There's already something delightful about taking little things about it that it values and scrubbing them away. So taking them as my own? Even hotter. I think it becomes gratuitous quickly, so it's a kind of rare treat, but it's quite the treat.
With "unawareness" type hypnokink, I think there's a kind of interesting spectrum of eroticism between "hot because it has no clue what's going on and it's constantly confused" and "hot because it's not allowed to reference what's going on and has to pretend to be outside the loop". I tend to see the first one focused on more, in part because I think the 'perfect unawareness' leans closer to the fantasy of it. But I think that more should be said about the 'permission structure' of unawareness. The kind of denial of hermeneutical autonomy, if i had to put a word for it. It doesn't matter what you know if you lack the right to interpret and communicate that interpretation, and that can be a very tangible kind of power. I mean, in the end, I think the two can be functionally indistinguishable, but I like thinking about the minutiae.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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in general i do think being called a title is at its hottest when the one using it clearly does not enjoy referring to you in that way. (this is in part because acting on pettiness is a key part of dominance). and hypnosis provides one of the best framings for such a thing, as well as language restriction being very hot in its own right. so it's an extremely natural pairing.
I think "what if we molded ourselves to each other perfectly" has legs as a kink dynamic if we could ever get anyone to take off their compulsive "understand any kink dynamic through dominance and submission" glasses
The best part about it genuinely is your movements get scary synced. Put all your energy into mirroring and learning and being suitable to each other and suddenly you get bored and miss them and they message that they were just thinking about you. Suddenly a cup of water appears in your hand when you're thirsty. It's weird and a little bit magical.
It takes time to set up. But it's super achievable and you can definitely start with like. Basic mimicry and hypnosis to get your feet wet. Later you start discussing your every boundary and value, nothing kept sacred, full agreement almost always the goal. This isn't exactly SSC but like. Per that other post neither is heavy obedience training. I think that's actually the hard part - society says it's fucked up to spend all your time devoted to someone, and a lot of people don't know how to reconcile wanting that without painting the person they're devoted to as evil and saying it's ok because it's consensual and the fact that it's evil is hot. You do not have to think this is evil. You can just staple your identity and sense of reality to someone and have them do the same back and watch your life get weirder. Make strange paracosms together. Lose track of who did what and whose tongue is whose. Join me in knowing the feeling of "I would answer that but I store that information in my other body."
I need more of you to become inseparable and borderline interchangeable. It's way too messy to be realistic for most but it's way too fun and achievable to be as underrepresented as it is.
