Stargate SG-1, 02.14 Touchstone
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Stargate SG-1, 02.14 Touchstone

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It was a Tuesday in 1981 when the San Francisco police kicked in the door.
Inside the small apartment, they expected to find a hardened criminal. They expected a drug kingpin. They expected resistance.
Instead, they found a 57-year-old waitress in an apron.
The air in the apartment smelled sweet, thick with chocolate and something earthier. On the kitchen counter, cooling on wire racks, were 54 dozen brownies.
The police officers began bagging the evidence. They confiscated nearly 18 pounds of marijuana. They handcuffed the woman, whose name was Mary Jane Rathbun.
She didn't look scared. She didn't look guilty.
She looked at the officers, smoothed her apron, and reportedly said, "I thought you guys were coming."
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Sometimes the shenanigans that come up in an episode of Stargate make me wonder about SGC HR and payroll.
Like, okay, so in Holiday Machello body-swaps with Daniel and then goes out and buys lunch for a bunch of random people in a diner. With Daniel's credit card. Now, I mean, maybe you can just call up the credit card company and say, "I didn't authorize this purchase," but if it was a large purchase, and it seems it probably was, the diner will probably challenge the chargeback, and they almost certainly have Daniel on camera. So like, how is this handled? Does Daniel just have to eat the cost? Budgeting for his credit card bill while cursing Machello for stealing his body and $500 worth of milkshakes? Or does the SGC have like. Insurance. For that sort of thing. Given the nature of the Goa'uld it's not unreasonable. $10 per paycheck and if your body gets hijacked by some kind of alien malevolence and spends all your money the Air Force will just quietly settle the bill in the event you survive and get your body back.
In A Matter of Time most of the SGC experiences a single day, but outside, two weeks go by due to the time dilation effects of the black hole. Some scrooge in payroll is patting themselves on the back for months for managing to successfully argue that everyone inside the mountain should only be paid for the time they actually experienced working, instead of the full two weeks of real time that they were at work. They severely regret it when Window of Opportunity rolls around and Jack and Teal'c scrape together the evidence that they experienced work for 2,160 hours in a single day.
As a manager of large, global HR and payroll departments, I also pondered the question of how to pay Jack in A Matter of Time, where one work day took two weeks, and in Window of Opportunity where he worked for thousands of hours in a time loop.
An aside - I have no idea how payroll works in the US Air Force so I am going on what decisions I would make.
First off Jack is very likely salaried exempt (US payroll speak for not eligable for overtime) as he is in a leadership position and seemingly has no fixed hours.
I would have made the decision to pay Jack for two weeks salary during that one shift in Matter of Time, because first, he is salaried, and second, policies encourage behaviours, and we would want staff to volunteer for dangerous missions, such as staying in the mountain when there is a black hole, without being financially penalised for the whole time dilation thing.
Consistent with this, and being exempt, Jack wouldn't be eligible for overtime in Window of Opportunity. I was thinking of a one-off bonus for the extra work, but what about other people who, for example, get stuck off-world for longer than planned? They could also argue to be eligible for bonuses, and payroll costs could spiral. Maybe some long paid PTO.
But in general, their payroll would be a nightmare and God only knows what workers comp would look like, but I would still 100% take the job 😂
And on the Daniel question, given he is a government contractor, he would definitely be able to expense his credit card bill after Holiday.
If anyone does knows how payroll in the Air Force works, let me know, just because I am a nerd and would be interested.
Interesting stuff! I’d also love to know how all the ‘back office’ departments deal with the strange things that happen at the SGC. Could have been a fun ‘Lower Decks’ type episode where the finance team is trying to carry out the quarterly budget review, but keeps being inconvenienced by the latest ‘aliens trying to invade earth’ nonsense.
Also, a friendly reminder that payroll departments don't make policy decisions about how staff are paid. They just process it, make sure all your deductions and earnings are accounted for, and deal with the tax authorities (IRS in US, HMRC in the UK, etc) and which ever other government department is interested. Be kind to the people who make sure you get paid correctly 😊
Sometimes the shenanigans that come up in an episode of Stargate make me wonder about SGC HR and payroll.
Like, okay, so in Holiday Machello body-swaps with Daniel and then goes out and buys lunch for a bunch of random people in a diner. With Daniel's credit card. Now, I mean, maybe you can just call up the credit card company and say, "I didn't authorize this purchase," but if it was a large purchase, and it seems it probably was, the diner will probably challenge the chargeback, and they almost certainly have Daniel on camera. So like, how is this handled? Does Daniel just have to eat the cost? Budgeting for his credit card bill while cursing Machello for stealing his body and $500 worth of milkshakes? Or does the SGC have like. Insurance. For that sort of thing. Given the nature of the Goa'uld it's not unreasonable. $10 per paycheck and if your body gets hijacked by some kind of alien malevolence and spends all your money the Air Force will just quietly settle the bill in the event you survive and get your body back.
In A Matter of Time most of the SGC experiences a single day, but outside, two weeks go by due to the time dilation effects of the black hole. Some scrooge in payroll is patting themselves on the back for months for managing to successfully argue that everyone inside the mountain should only be paid for the time they actually experienced working, instead of the full two weeks of real time that they were at work. They severely regret it when Window of Opportunity rolls around and Jack and Teal'c scrape together the evidence that they experienced work for 2,160 hours in a single day.
As a manager of large, global HR and payroll departments, I also pondered the question of how to pay Jack in A Matter of Time, where one work day took two weeks, and in Window of Opportunity where he worked for thousands of hours in a time loop.
An aside - I have no idea how payroll works in the US Air Force so I am going on what decisions I would make.
First off Jack is very likely salaried exempt (US payroll speak for not eligable for overtime) as he is in a leadership position and seemingly has no fixed hours.
I would have made the decision to pay Jack for two weeks salary during that one shift in Matter of Time, because first, he is salaried, and second, policies encourage behaviours, and we would want staff to volunteer for dangerous missions, such as staying in the mountain when there is a black hole, without being financially penalised for the whole time dilation thing.
Consistent with this, and being exempt, Jack wouldn't be eligible for overtime in Window of Opportunity. I was thinking of a one-off bonus for the extra work, but what about other people who, for example, get stuck off-world for longer than planned? They could also argue to be eligible for bonuses, and payroll costs could spiral. Maybe some long paid PTO.
But in general, their payroll would be a nightmare and God only knows what workers comp would look like, but I would still 100% take the job 😂
And on the Daniel question, given he is a government contractor, he would definitely be able to expense his credit card bill after Holiday.
If anyone does knows how payroll in the Air Force works, let me know, just because I am a nerd and would be interested.
Good stuff.
This. This is good fiction writing advice. I really appreciate how it was formatted as “this is a common problem, here is a solution to try in your own work” and not “oh god, don’t do that!” without any extra help. And I extra appreciated the “don’t rely on adverbs” bit, because they do have their place but they aren’t the only way actions can be emphasized.
TAG GAME ❗️❗️❗️
Mine
....I don't mind
I'll tag @rasin-c00ldude @bonnie181987 @latinumenthusiast @bubonichronic @hugoreyeswife @pepsicanzonthefloor @elliotmustd1e @fuckin8alien @frerardisreal666 @goatcutter @rowenrefugee @psycocilybe @enora-elk-kirkton @vierraz @whotfisflight and anyone else who want
Well, I guess my husband won't mind taking a break for the quick inheritance... 🤪
@pirate-of-the-southern-isles @bethanydelleman @firawren @annaofthenorthernlights @the-red-butterfly
Uhm, yeah,.... hahah no comment... 😊 (oh, and in case you are wondering which chatacter it is... it's Hans 🤣)
Tagging for the fun @the-paris-of-people @rahchan-writes-again @sunflowers-and-sandwiches @hiptoff @glassslippers-n-cowboyboots @99goosebumps
At last my hyperfixations pay off! We shall be very happy in the enchanted forest— she can do the magic while I make the soup 🍲❄️✨
No pressure tags @paigebstorey @true--north @somecallmejohn
Looks like I have been tagged for this again. Thanks, @sunflowers-and-sandwiches!
Let’s see who I got this time… 🥁
This image was created by and is the property of @chroncruik.
Eda Clawthorne (aka the Owl Lady, aka the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles)!
I guess that’s one way to join the Bad Girl Coven, though I still feel like I’m more of an honorary owlet than a possible partner, but I suppose the age gap will get smaller with time…
(Then again, there are flashbacks of her when she was younger!)
Who’s Getting Tagged This Time?
@crownprincessoftherusalkas @snowberriesromanoff @dootznbootz @writerqueenofjewels @cherryp0ffs @myownfantasyrealm @heds-n-tails
Somebody else's OCs! Lol, these are from @spookberry
Tagging:
@mournesse @twisting-echo @cleverqueen2 @bearlylola
Thanks for the tag!
Welp💀
@breezee513 @hannahhook7744 @cheerfullycatholic @gravitilly @daughter-of-mary @ramiesie and anyone else who likes to join!
Thank you for the tag @cleverqueen2! 💙
No pressure tags: @butterflies-and-bumble-bees, @cat-a-holic, @schrodingers-blursed-kitty, @argen-lobo-ridder, @two-microscopes, @furubat, @hearing-in-color, @jedidragonrider, @cursedchildofchaos, @frogressive-rock, @angeltreasure, @orthodoxadventure, and everyone else who wants to do it 💙
Well.....this could get awkward 😅
Anyway @wishuponroses @gwydionae @become-mop @vitamaeternum @my-mom-does-not-have-it-going-on @humanradiojmp @thelegendofsqam
Okay so the first character I had is literally spending extensive time & research to figure out how to make it back to her crush. It would be near impossible to even slow her down to even ask to marry her. I also don't want to marry Black Panther or Tony the Tiger, lol.
Next up is... Rosalina. Ya know... I think I could be okay with this. 🩵
(No pressure) just for fun tags: @my-mom-does-not-have-it-going-on @milksugarjams @misty-eyed-memory @gessec @citadelofthestars @corvusherpestidae and anyone else who may wish to join.
Davy Jones or Lord Beckett: I am running as fast as possible in the opposite direction. They will never find me.
Commodore James Norrington: Yeah, that's a decent option.
EDIT: I forgor tag
np - @a-lil-strawberry @butterflies-and-bumble-bees @bedes-silliest-soldier @duellwalzer @naginatamybeloved @rantsramblesandrandomthougts @blade-liger-4ever
i was like pshaw i have zero fictional characters in my camera roll buuuut
I forgot
Tsurumi from golden kamuy so it's not looking good
I'll tag @esters-notepad @takemethroughthegate @become-mop @geminiagentgreen
Oh man. I like this game a lot hahaha
I got me a Jack O’Neill!!! 😆😆😆😆
Tagging @multiverse-of-misfits @janetfraiserspenlight @wildhorsestealcwildhorses @marina-ponders @backinblack-80 and @brigitoshaughnessy although I have a feeling we’re marrying the same man bahaha.
@takemethroughthegate Looks like we have a fight on our hands 😂
Tagging @elenath9 @jumpingpuddles @vimesbootstheory @lulamadison

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Stargate SG-1, 06.08 The Other Guys
Happy Valley 0201 | Sarah Lancashire as Catherine Cawood
i get so emotional every time i think about fanfic culture. it's just so beautiful that people are writing and anonymously posting these thousand-word stories about characters we all love and not even getting any money or public fame from it. it's literally just for the love of the game.
shout out to everyone who participates in fanfic culture, be it reading or writing fanfics. you are contributing to such a lovely thing <3
Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.
i do think lobbying for data centres over climate goals should be considered a crime against humanity btw

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Another Elizabeth art because I love her
SG1'S 1K CELEBRATION ☆ Anonymous requested ↳ Sam and Daniel moments