you’re telling me this phobia is homo?
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we're not kids anymore.

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if i look back, i am lost

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@b0ychik
you’re telling me this phobia is homo?

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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You either die and go to superhell or you live long enough to see yourself become the clown juggler
You, a Paladin, have been sent to hunt down a former member of your order, but you now have started to doubt. Your holy light flickers, barely a candle anymore, but theirs? It shines brighter than the sun.
everything is about reaching the ending except for the ending which is about wanting to go back to the start

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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being a young millenial/old gen z is like yeah i have phone numbers memorised: my own, my mom’s, and my childhood best friend’s landline which probably has not been in service for 10 years
What
What the fuck
I have to say I love the increasing amount of tik toks made by 20-somethings that start out as pretty fair criticisms of types of people most of us meet at one point or another, but that gradually turn into surrealist horror where you’re not sure how they started anymore, and then abruptly loop back to the starting point at the end. It’s fucking surreal and I love it
It just keeps escalating
girl help i managed my time poorly and now im suffering the consequences
So when my office neighbor went on vacation a few weeks ago, I did a very professional office prank where I took down the diplomas from his office wall and replaced him with these (redacted to preserve his dignity):
I’m on vacation this week, and I knew for a fact that he was going to try to prank me back, so I made a few defensive preparations before I left. Specifically, I’ve got this awful golden alligator figurine on my desk that I bought for a few bucks at a flea market, and he usually plays with it whenever he goes into my office. It was his most likely target, so I planned accordingly.
Today I got this text from him:
See, I planned far enough ahead that I even took these photos for posterity the day before I left for vacation:
5D chess, boys.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Unmute !
Captions
Woman in purple, in a high pitched, enthusiastic voice: if you’re not at work today or you’re working from home, you may be wondering, whAt day is it?
Man in suit, emotionless and factual: itsmonday
End captions
GUYS I KNOW THE PERFECT WAY TO EXPLOIT THE NEW TUMBLR GLITCH
REBLOG THIS POST WITH AN ADDITION
Just for recordskeeping should this eventually get patched
somebody please god make the “jesse what the fuck are you talking about” meme with the recent anon ask drama
CALLOUT POST: Faye @drunkspacearchivist is a tumblrina

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Why am i laughing so hard?
THE FUCKING HANDS
help- i-
Question:,, HOW do you make wolf 359 more Horrofying??
Time can be a very terrifying thing; especially when it isn't working the way it should. Time loops happen around Wolf 359 sometimes, sure. But maybe it also bleeds. Maybe one moment seeps into another. Maybe the Hephaestus crews haunt each other, and themselves.
Imagine this: Eiffel asking Minkowski about a conversation that she knows never took place, but he swears it did. He tells her how she seemed upset about something, and he seems genuinely a little concerned, but it's brushed off in order to deal with the next near-catastrophe.
And then, Eiffel is lost in deep space after the explosion. A year passes, and everyone is still grieving. Minkowski wanders the Hephaestus while everyone else sleeps, Hera is occupied with some update or other, when she sees Eiffel.
He looks different. Not as thin, or as pale; the way he was every since the Decima attack. He looks like how he did before this mess started. Then he just starts talking to her, like he wasn't gone, (most likely dead) and offhandedly mentions Hilbert like the man didn't try to kill them all. And then she realizes...this is familiar.
She remembers Eiffel recounting this conversation with her, trying to mask his concern about her. And she sees it now, as Eiffel asks if she's alright, if she slept at all, and all she can do is nod along, and try to just have the last conversation with her communications officer she'll ever have.
Or maybe imagine this: Lovelace runs into a frantic Hui, who is shocked to see her, before he becomes inconsolable. She takes him to a more private area to try and calm him down, but it takes a while. He finally manages to blubber out how he thought she was dead, that he saw her, dead.
Of course, she isn't dead. She's right here with him, running a hand through his hair to help ground him. His hand is gripping her jumpsuit, and he's shaking so badly she can feel herself start to shake, too. Or maybe she's just scared, worried about her friend.
He calms down enough eventually to explain to her what he saw. He tells her how there was a body bag, floating in the middle of the docking bay. How, as he moved closer, he felt sick with dread building in his stomach. How, when he pulled the zipper with trembling fingers, he was frozen when he saw his Captains face, eyes closed, and a bullet hole placed neatly in the middle of her forehead.
There's a moment as she processes what he told her, a moment while Hui's lip begins trembling again, before she pulls him closer. He needs rest, clearly. He's tired, obviously. She rests her chin on top of his head. 'That wasn't me, Hui,' She tells him, 'That wasn't me.'
The Hephaestus is a haunted house. The past haunts the present haunts the future haunts the past. One crew hears the voices of another crew that came long before them, or will come long after them.