DOCTOR BITCHCRAFT

#you don't hate these foods you hate capitalism <- ooh there it is!

one of the best parts of making up increasingly wild and specific aus with a friend is sending them posts like "this is sooo blorbo in torture chamber au number 15" and they reply back like "YESSS btw have i told you about my latest idea for how to torture them even more" and you get to enjoy a little snack and kick your feet with glee

anyone else absolutely guzzling the shit out of some wadder? a fucking boddle of wadder?

The fastest way to accomplish The Project is to cease being afraid of The Project. The Project cannot maim you. The Project cannot kill you. The Project is more afraid of you than you are of it. It is okay if The Project turns out differently from how it was in your head, and it is okay if it has flaws. You are capable of engaging with The Project.

MY DINAR 🔥 (blurry picture of a terrified man tied up laying on his side on a basement floor)

Supermassive Black Hole lends itself to soundtracking one thing and one thing alone and that is a strip club. Supermassive Black Hole is the most perfect strip club rock song I've ever heard. I've heard rock songs *about* strip clubs that feel less suited to a strip club than Supermassive Black Hole. I have heard songs where sex is explicitly described in the lyrics that feel less sexy than Supermassive Black Hole. Supermassive Black Hole is a song so disgustingly, flagrantly, enticingly slutty that I sometimes feel legitimately shocked that it was made by a band that most people make fun of for sounding like if Radiohead sold out after their first album. It is a crowning achievement in stripper music that may never be topped in our lifetime. It is best known for soundtracking the scene in the first Twilight movie where they play baseball.

the anniversary of library paste man’s death is in four days.

One hundred and ten years ago to the day. Amazing. Incredible.

RIP😔🙏📚🍯

i swear if the wizard doesnt let me out of his abandoned salt mine soon im gonna fucking LOSE IT

what did you do to be put into the salt mine

i MAY have eaten his special wizard meal. but i think he should let me out tbh

was it good? was it worth it? are you able to bear the weight of your sin?

im not gonna lie it was fucking delicious i would fucking do it again. wait shit youre the fucking wizard in disguise seeing if ive learned my lesson arent you. fuck.

10 YEARS IN THE ABANDONED SALT MINE.

American diet and "healthy living" culture is insane and runs DEEP

who the heck is eating dice, cards, and pool

WHAT is the first one supposed to be? It looks like 'piecing between meals' to me, but that can't be what it says, right?

It does in fact say “piecing between meals” and it refers to snacking

I'm more struck by the fact that the progression set forth here implies that laudanum and cocaine are less concerning that spicing your food.

The fastest way to accomplish The Project is to cease being afraid of The Project. The Project cannot maim you. The Project cannot kill you. The Project is more afraid of you than you are of it. It is okay if The Project turns out differently from how it was in your head, and it is okay if it has flaws. You are capable of engaging with The Project.

needless to say I am hopelessly dependent on The Character

Please stop he is drowning…..