crazy that Goncharov (1973) will be 50 years old in a few months because it seems like it just came out yesterday

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

This is funnier than anything I have ever said.

beam me up scotty (beam me up inside) can’t beam up (beam me up inside)

i think villains in general provide better, more epic romances because they're allowed to go to extremes. they're allowed to put their love over the greater good. they're allowed to be selfish. the best a hero can offer you is number two, because their duty comes first. villains, though. villains will burn down the world for a last kiss goodbye.

Yea, sure. Until YOU or people you love are among the victims for someone else’s love and the villains won’t care. Would also like to point out that some villians(Kuvira, for example) have been willing to sacrifice/throw away love interests for their own goals.

idk about you but existing in the real world gives me and my loved ones immunity from the actions of fictional villains. hope you manage to get your family out of star wars.

montero and take me to church are two sides of the same extremely sexy coin

my grandpa is always making fun of old people he sees like he’s not 85

he goes “wow today was old folks day at olive garden” i was like yeah grandpa that’s why we brought you there at 4:30pm

This post took 3 years off my life

I’ll take “words that perfectly describe the Académie Française but which would literally kill them to hear” for 500, Alex.

time for a kickstarter to force them to hear these words

Tumblr keeps suggesting this post and I’m going to reblog it every time I see it

hello again old friend

This post goes around Tumblr every year, and it’s always true. There’s never been an uneventful or boring January.

Why is this the way I have to find out

I was shocked and appalled when I learned that jesters were actually well regarded and rich in a monarchy. I thought they were my allies 😡

#-ppl becoming disillusioned with celebrities behavior in covid lockdown

Hockey rules I never knew about.