pure, lucid, evil

people who say they don't understand sports annoy me because it's just a competency kink. like its cool to see people be good at things. like out of everyone in the world this one random guy was blessed or cursed with insane powers and he can for some reason beat literally everyone else at everything. that's like stuff out of myths. and he happens to look like a gas station attendant. or when a young person is so fucking good at their sport that they draw followers who travel to see them and then people spread the word about the person and this person revolutionizes their sport and this person is like a 20 year old woman from des moines.

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

&also it allows you to experience the joy of talking like an autistic vampire, which i highly recommend

The most PATHETIC lil baby sounds...

I love when little creatures who are entirely loved and well cared for have the BIGGEST baby reactions to normal things. Like yes sweet pea, you DO have the hardest life of anyone ever, for sure, and you’re SO BRAVE about this minor inconvenience of *checks notes* having some water touch you

There is nothing sadder and more pathetic than a baby marine mammal having to get into the water. They are suffering the most out of any baby animal ever. How dare they be introduced to their natural environment.

the first time i heard the phrase “i need that like a hole in the head” it didn’t even occur to me that many people don’t live with passive suicidal ideation at all times so i just assumed it was a way of saying that you really really needed something and i have continued to use it that way ever since

T-shirt that says "I'M SORRY FOR THE PERSON I BECOME WHEN I'M OVERHEATED"

You literally just have to get really good at continuing.

“Do it scared” “do it alone” are all great tips, but my biggest takeaway from therapy is do it messy. This is especially true if you’re getting out of a burnout, which I experience often. Literally just do it messy. You don’t need to pick the perfect trail to walk, the perfect playlist to listen to, whatever the fuck it is. You don’t need to have a meticulous to do list and wake up at the exact time you planned and drink the exact amount of water you planned to drink. Like the biggest thing for people like me to remember is sometimes it’s okay to do it messy. Put on a random yt workout and just get it done in sweats. Do 5 minutes of a daunting task and go from there. Sometimes just getting up is a win during intense burnouts or depressive funks. Literally just do it messy.