As lost as Alice

"it's all taken care of! you don't have to worry about it." i do, though. i literally should have worried about it.

when you relate to a song too much so you can’t listen to it ever again

DO NOT BREAK THE WINDOW! he has NO food and NO water, he is listening to his LEAST FAVORITE MUSIC, the HEAT IS ON and the WINDOWS ARE SEALED WITH LIQUID CEMENT. we HATE OUR SHITTY DOG and ARE TRYING TO KILL HIM. thanks!

are there really people who use tumblr with timestamps turned off. what are you doing

I can’t overshare because that would be very humiliating but everyone else should overshare because I like to know everything

"can you be a fan of a video game you havent played" discourse is stupid, because plenty of people who played the game have some of the dumbest fucking takes ive ever seen

you can have multiple most gorgeous looking women giving performance of their lifetime in a movie or show yet people will still come out obsessing & wanting to fuck a white man with the personality of a wet cardboard

I love helping everyone rediscover the fact that the opening passage of My Immortal is a parody of the opening passage of The Vampire Lestat and not just a generic exaggeration of the typical fanfic Mary Sue introduction. One of the many delightful goth kid Easter eggs the author planted for the audience.

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog