My AO3 || 38, she/her
|| Has a job, a hobby, and a mortgage || Userpic art: Lily Evans pin-up by constancezin || Header by melbellelove || Blog title by rude anon
Nom De Plume (46.5k). Completed, rated E. Favourite Canon Divergent Long 2024. Rec'd by @charmsandtealeaves, @joyseuphoria, @neverenoughmarauders and @practicecourts.
James Potter, renowned potioneer, has a secret side career as an erotica writer under the pen name of Scarlett Goldwing. When his latest book starts to take off, and Scarlett is asked to promote it at a public event, he has no other option but to recruit his colleague Lily Evans to pretend to be Scarlett. The only problem is, Lily Evans hates his guts… or does she?
Fixed Luck (1.3k). Completed, rated T. Favourite Angst 2024. Mind the tags! Rec'd by @abihastastybeans, @kay-elle-cee, @neverenoughmarauders and @tedwardremus.
The books warn: excessive intake can cause giddiness, recklessness, and dangerous overconfidence. But good luck is addictive.
Oh My God, She's Insane (7.7k). Completed, rated M. Favourite Canon Divergent Short 2025, Favourite Humour/Crack 2025. Rec'd by @blitheringmcgonagall, @charmsandtealeaves, @neverenoughmarauders.
When the Order of the Phoenix discovers that Lucius Malfoy, rich bachelor and womaniser extraordinaire, may secretly be a Death Eater with access to an item that could be the key to bringing down Voldemort, Lily Evans comes up with a brilliant plan: to seduce him into inviting her to his house, and then take the opportunity to snoop around for information.
James Potter, her mission partner, is less than thrilled with this idea.
Readers' favourites (under the cut):
The Chaperone (7.5k). Jily, Petunia Evans, Sirius Black, canon. Completed, rated T. Rec'd by @casquecest, @neverenoughmarauders and @plecotusauritus.
When Lily's father won't let her go out alone on a date with James, she has to resort to desperate measures: make it a double date with Petunia and Sirius.
Halloween Specials (867 words). Jily, James & Sirius, Rosmerta. Canon, 6th year. Completed, rated T. Rec'd by @neverenoughmarauders.
It's Halloween Eve. The Three Broomsticks is packed with Hogwarts students.
At the bar, two funny, handsome young men are chatting to the barmaid.
Her Favourite (1.1k). Minerva McGonagall, James Potter, canon. Rated G. Rec'd by @neverenoughmarauders.
If Minerva McGonagall had a son, she would have wanted him to be like James Potter.
Two Steps At A Time (1.4k). Slytherin!Lily, Sirius Black. Completed, rated G. Rec'd by @neverenoughmarauders.
Lost in the vast Hogwarts castle, first-year student Lily Evans finds her way to her common room with the help of an unlikely classmate.
White Swan (930 words). Jily, fluff. Completed, rated G. Rec'd by @charmsandtealeaves.
“I thought we were only going to watch,” he teases. “I didn’t realise you were the night’s prima ballerina.”
It’s been years since Lily was forced to abandon that dream – since she exchanged tutus and ballet slippers for black robes and a wand – and there’s no bitterness lingering. Still, she crosses her arms over her chest and raises a challenging eyebrow at him. They both like a challenge – revel in it, really. “Are you making fun of my outfit?”
“Not at all. I’m just saying, nobody’s going to be looking at Odette when you’re looking like that.”
James and Lily go on a date to watch ballet.
If you read my works, please feel free to send me asks or messages to add or update your recs!
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Just watched Adam Conover (of Adam Ruins Everything) make such a solid point that I think we should spread far and wide. Yes, having AI write your emails is lazy, sure, but people love being lazy. We need to really emphasize that sending AI emails (or using AI responses on social media, or publishing AI flyers, or or or) is rude.
It's rude. You're making someone take their time to read something you couldn't bother to write. You're telling them they were so unimportant you couldn't be bothered to actually take the time to say something yourself. And frankly, you're lying about it while you're at it.
americans are sooo desensitized to guns and sometimes it manifests in ways that affect your media literacy. like remember in the first episode of sherlock when john watson opens up his drawer and you see a gun in there and youre supposed to understand that this is narratively significant and conveys his suicidality as well as his willingness to skirt rules and laws but the first time i watched it i was like oh well theres his desk gun. lots of people have those
Peter is the only marauder who actually knows how to do proper adult stuff. James never cared to pay attention and was spoiled rotten. Sirius only knows how to do all the talking and the ordering. Remus grew up sheltered by both his parents.
Need to go to the bank? Call Peter. Which detergent goes in the laundry? Peter knows. Whose going grocery shopping? Peter. How to make a job resume? Peter will know. What are taxes? Ask Peter!!
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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it’s so special to me that so much of fan culture is textual analysis for the love of the game. like thank god there are people in my phone who are also thinking about this thing i love so much that they are writing transformative fiction as character studies and setting clips of the show to music with theme-relevant lyrics and writing long text posts analyzing every line of dialogue like!! yay!!!
Okay so Victorian erotica is literally the most heinous, morally bankrupt, horrific shit I've ever read - but I've read a fair bit, partly from historical interest but also because a while back I helped a friend with a university project she was doing about censorship and pornography in 19th century England.
Anyway I need to share with you all the most hilarious line that has ever been written, circa 1887:
I feel like this excerpt is significantly enhanced by knowing that the novel in question is a first-person narrative written from the perspective of an inexplicably sapient flea who lives on Bella's body, and that's why the third priest's penis is described in this way: from the narrator's perspective it literally blots out the sky.
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This was a man, dressed as a plant, making pigeon noises at people walking by. I said hello, asked if it was okay to take his picture, and then asked why he was dressed as a plant. He said, “I’m just working through some stuff. Thank you for asking. No ones asked yet.”
Last week I went to Vienna, and while I was there, I visited a waste incinerator. This may sound like a strange thing to do, but the Spittelau Incinerator is not your average trash-burning facility. It was originally built in the 1960s, but following a major fire in the mid-80s, it was rebuilt to a design by visionary artist Friedensreich Hundertwasser. You can't go inside, but you can walk most of the way around it and get an ever-changing view of its patterns and decorative details. The chimney with its golden bauble (which holds an emissions monitoring station) makes a striking landmark for the local area.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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