Get Lucky Once

Actually my favorite replacement for both 'kill myself' jokes and jokes about reacting violently to things/people that upset me is "I'm going to end up on the news" like it's versatile, it's vague, it's not going to get me in trouble with any censors or websites that take joke threats seriously, it's family friendly while still getting the point across, what's not to love???

forgot my night time garlic bread in the oven for the length of 2 mythbusters wpisodes and when i opened the oven door it was so thoroughly cremated that i was blinded not by smoke and ash but what surely must have been its Soul as well

Fun Fact, more men should have medium to long hair

this makes so much more sense now???

Why didn’t this meme come with a translator’s note

i love those blinking red lights they put on top of radio towers and windmills and skyscrapers etc, theyre like electronic flowers or something to me

kind eyes of angels

Remote and alien intelligences. Lonely. Observe everything, judge nothing. Understood me as a child. Passed awareness of me from tower to tower all the way home during nighttime drives.

i loved this poem so much that i memorized it and to this day i sometimes mutter it under my breath to keep my welding tempo even

sorry for not posting much! they only let me out twice a month

Let you out of what, Miku?

zip file

they should add a fishing minigame to tumblr

Having balls is crazy, why the hell do I have an exposed weak-point like some video game boss? Who designed this? Shigeru Miyamoto? How is it I’m a 6”6’ guy and a grazing hit to the groin will leave me on the floor in pain. Terrible design. Women do not have such flaws. That is why they scare me.

Viper’s got you in the pipe, 5 by 5.

HOW

I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET

SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU

I GOT THIS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

What the heck why not

Give me the DOOT DOOT

PLEASE DOOT DOOT ME

There’s no way this is actually going to work but here I am 

ohh man.. does it work…

so do I need to write something?

Actually???