I Am Steve Rogers

feeds you ibuprofen out of the palm of my hand like youre a horse

weird how no one ever comments on the absence of smells unprompted. the nose just isn't a topic of conversation unless it's urgent huh

Quality content

immovable object is an amazing description for a person who once said “I don’t think our death ray is working. I’m standing right in it, and I’m not dead yet.”

truly think broccoli is the perfect side veggie, the stem parts are a bit harder to overcook so they can keep a good bite while the bushy parts absorb any sauces or juices you might have on your plate from the entre… absolute blast 

i dont remember if i said this b4 but i think it would be super funny if gamefreak added a new normal type eeveelution that just evolves at level 45 or something and the pokedex entry is just “it took so long for scientists to discover this eevee evolution because no one has ever raised an eevee without it evolving into something else by accident”

I was watching this on mute and I was like, someone should set this to the Benny Hill music.

What’s an iPod?

been on tumblr so long my text post is outdated…