M. Ambry

"we don't have girl talk, we have creature talk," my roommate Julia just said while rolling on the floor, "put that on your fucking tumblr, they'll love that shit"

she just asked how many notes this post has and I told her eighteen and with restrained glee she said "this is going to do horrible things to my ego"

Hey op why is the contact icon a T if their name is Julia? *condescending tone* do you have your roommate saved as “trash” in your phone?

This too shall pass but like holy fuck

My partner is so autistic that I tried eye contact as a punishment once during sex and they had to safe word

All my homies love boobs and hate the government

"We can't help homeless people. That costs money. Instead, we'll spend even more money to make them suffer more."

the second eel at the end in its little cuck shelter 💜