Ive Never Known Whats Happening Once In My Life

I think a lot about this one twitter post where someone, lacking a few crucial pieces of information, says "you know jesus wasn't real" (not really the popular stance among non-religious scholars these days, but fair enough) "and neither was muhammad" (the degree of historical attestation here is a bit different)

the first point's buy-in is that multiple accounts fabricate the presence of a preacher, the second point's buy-in is that the entire arabian peninsula woke up one fine morning and decided it was conquered

If you saw me recreationally vaccinating homeschooled children with blow darts then you should be thanking me, no? Relax a little. Blow darts are cool

You are just jealous of my ethical human safari

doomscrolling tiktok together and I turn to you and ask, "why doesn't your algorithm recommend any videos with Black people?"

just heard this 7yo say to her brother "i'm going to go back in time to when you were a baby to touch your soft spot >:(" which was extremely funny to hear but what the hell man

recurring dead wife flashback where it becomes increasingly apparent that the person remembering her has dishonestly claimed a romantic dynamic to their relationship that never actually existed and erased any conflict that ever existed between them now that she's no longer able to say no to them

dead wife flashback where each time we see her she looks more confused and upset by how she's remembered, then desperate and furious, until she's hammering on the glass screaming to be let out

this isn't how it happened. you know this isn't how it happened. but you still keep coming back, keep disturbing my grave so you can play out your fantasies. voyeurs crowding around my autopsy, straining for the best view; pawing through my entrails like grubby butchers trying to find some golden meaning in blood and shit because you can't bear to face the cold light of truth. you just can't bear the thought of never having really known me at all.

another history making marvel post I never see anyone talk about is “so is nobody helping blade kill all those vampires”

I think we should figure out what age we’re living in now so we can say how it’s collapsing to each other

Our age of plastics is collapsing

I don't remember finding fart jokes particularly funny even when I was a child.

Five year old me, watching a movie with fart jokes: "Oh, how gauche. They're pandering to the lowest common denominator."

Someone will say "as a queer person in the heart of empire, my life is in danger every day" and you'll find out they're a developer for Amazon and live in San Francisco or Seattle or some shit, and then you'll meet a trans girl from Alva, OK who's like "Yeah, things are pretty good. AutoZone moved me to full-time."

Someone in a queer group in my current blue city said that they didn't like expressions of solidarity because it "diluted their oppression".

#That's what I mean when I say the foundation of feminism and queer community should not fixate on victimhood #Once you feel that our suffering is our shared experience an not our love then our suffering becomes vital to the culture #I don't want a culture where suffering is vital #I want a culture where love is celebrated #The suffering is an imposition not a prerequisite #And yeah I sure fucking hope our oppression is diluted bitch you WANT us freebasing the uncut shit???

sweating us so fucking weird, like, if humans did our thermoregulation in a different way and other species we were frequently in contact with did sweating, we would all be like EW THIS IS SO WEIRD

ive said it before but please continue to boycott starbucks until they finalize a fair contract with the union or at the very least stop making their workers inhale silica powder for the stupid ass blended refreshers. i know a girl who was out sick for a week with respiratory issues from ts

Silica is a tightly regulated OSHA issue. If there's enough of it, they'll say workers need to wear N95 masks and fine the company for health regulation issues.

if i made first contact and built an entire tunnel to connect our ships, made a plurimaterial divider wall to see what the alien's senses were better at dealing with, unmade it, REmade it in their preference, figured out the atmospheric composition for their side AND supplied it, made an airlock, built an improvised life support system for myself to enter the alien's ship, unmade the ENTIRE TUNNEL AGAIN and then rebuilt it with an even bigger airlock to pass through it so the alien is working in his own environment while i live in the equivalent of a human hamster ball and after all this the alien camel gurgled because i asked him to help me bring in my stuff and disconnect the tunnel. because I'm in a hamster ball. so we can do this in his environment. rocky i am so sorry. 46 years of traumatic isolation and 1 inch of solid xenonite are the only things standing between ryland grace and the most deserved ass beating of his life oooh my god you fucking brat. get over yourself

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