Alan of All Trades

also websites that  automatically replace your typed out <3 and :D with emojis upon sending them are a Danger To Everything That’s Good In The World

bring back nose smilies :-)

There is no emoji that captures what I mean by :P (I do NOT mean “hur hur goofy-ass face!”) and the one for :^/ is not great. And lest we forget, 🤷🏻‍♀️ is absolutely inadequate compared to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I am too old to stop using XD

Whatever the name of this team is, I am on it

this is   awesome

._. is pretty good too and 😐 just ISN’T THE SAME

XD, ^-^, :3, <3, and =P until death

¬_¬ is the most eloquent keystroke combo

U_U is my fav, and also O_O

the SHEER MISCHIEF of OvO

me af

Kaomoji (≧ᗜ≦)

>:3 Rawr

:D

Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.

Cuntrapposto.

Cuntrapusso

the fact that at the council of elrond glorfindel is like “just throw the ring into the ocean” is so funny to me after reading the silmarillion just because it feels like the subtext is him being like “yeah let’s try maglor’s patented and tested method: Just Yeet The Accursed Fucking Thing Into The Water”

#in fairness they do do literally the other fëanorion approved method of magical item disposal #glorfindel: we could do like maglor and throw it in the ocean? #elrond: no we’re doing like maedhros and jumping into a volcano via @lesbianlanval

Those…those really are the four methods aren’t they?

Listen, Boromir knows 1 (one) ancient elven story and damn it, he’s going to ride that horse until it dies.

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

Like you can remove a lot of the mystique around North Korea by going “well, humans live there, and are driven by the same human impulses I, a human, am familiar with, so they’re probably not an alien life form like I’ve been led to believe”

anyway if u watch the new Harry Potter show in any way for any reason you're part of the problem. if you pirate it you're part of the problem, if you "watch it critically" you're part of the problem, if you watch it for the purpose of a smug little video essay pointing out some problematic element in it, you're part of the problem. it doesn't matter if some element of the show is problematic, the show existing is problematic. don't give it any revenue or contribute to its cultural relevance. boycott it and let it wither on the fucking vine

if you dont have a fursona at this point youre just being unprofessional