All men must die, but we are not men.

when people are like "i didn't come here to make friends" i'm like thats sooooo unrelatable. i am always on the look out for some girl friends. I would be in that hunger games cornucopia like "your ex boyfriend did WHAT."

Get hot water, not boiling hot but almost hotter than you can stand, and put a metal spoon in it for a few seconds. Take the spoon and put it against the mosquito bite for about 30 seconds. Do it a few times if you like. The proteins that cause the itching are susceptible to heat and break down.

WHY DON’T THEY TEACH THIS SHIT I have four decades of suffering from skeeter bites behind me

Deplatforming is um when you take a goth girl’s boots off.

official boob post

i believe someone may have misread boots

i may have dyslexia but i never make mistakes

Sometimes real life beats the shit out of movies can you imagine LIVING THIS

[image description: a digital drawing of an opossum with clown makeup, including a round red nose, and a polka-dot bowtie- they also have a balloon floating up from their tail. text above and below them says “it is april and i am the fool”]

Tadaa! Behold! It is a me!