We have more body than skinny people so we also contain more water and therefore need to drink more. 2 Litres is something skinny people need to drink we need more. I aim for 4 litres a day.

While any waterbased liquid is good try to not drink all 4 litres in coke or soda. I absolutley do recommend sport drinks or similar things. Fat people like us, or at least me, sweat a lot in this heat even without sport. Refill those electrolytes. Your body will thank you.

My go to drink at home is a 2 litre jug of water with just enough store bought raspberry or orange syrup that it has a taste thats not water.

Please stay hydrated in this heat and take care of your body. Its the only one you have.

Active Listening: One of the most obvious signs of emotional intelligence is the ability to listen attentively and actively. An emotionally intelligent person will give you their full attention when you’re speaking, making eye contact, nodding, and asking thoughtful follow-up questions. They don’t interrupt or jump to conclusions. For example, if you’re telling a colleague about a problem you’re facing, they might say, ‘I hear you. That sounds tough. What do you think is the best next step?’ This shows empathy and validation of your feelings.

Self-Awareness: Emotionally intelligent people tend to have a high level of self-awareness. They know their strengths and weaknesses and aren’t afraid to admit when they’re wrong or need help. You’ll notice that they’re comfortable talking about their own feelings and can express emotions without shame or defensiveness. For instance, in a disagreement, a self-aware person might say, ‘I realize I got really defensive just now. I’m sorry.’ This takes courage and emotional maturity. It’s a sign of someone who is aware of their emotions and can regulate them.

Empathy: Emotionally intelligent people are able to put themselves in others' shoes and truly understand what others are feeling. You’ll notice that they’re not just sympathetic, they’re deeply empathetic, which means they take the time to understand others' perspectives. Imagine you’re going through a tough time and a friend says, ‘I’m here for whatever you need.’ That kind of response shows empathy and it acknowledges your pain and offers support without trying to fix or judge.

Emotional Regulation: Emotional intelligent people know how to manage their emotions, especially in stressful or challenging situations. They don’t lash out in anger, become passive-aggressive, or shut down. Instead, they remain calm, composed, and respond thoughtfully to situations. For example, in a stressful meeting, an emotionally intelligent person might say, ‘I’m feeling frustrated right now, but I think it’s important we focus on the solution. Let’s take a moment.’ This shows they can regulate their reactions and keep the bigger picture in mind.

Conflict Resolution: Emotionally intelligent individuals are great at resolving conflicts in a calm, constructive manner. They don’t escalate tension or play blame games. Instead, they work collaboratively toward solutions and focus on mutual understanding. So, let’s say a friend is upset with you, and instead of blaming them back, an emotionally intelligent response could be, ‘I understand that my actions hurt you. Let’s talk about what happened and find a way to move forward.’ This shows maturity and the ability to navigate tough conversations without damaging the relationship.

Adaptability and Flexibility: Emotionally intelligent people are adaptable and able to cope with change. They don’t get stuck in rigid thinking and are open to new ideas and perspectives. In a workplace or social situation, they can shift gears easily when things don’t go as planned, showing that they can remain positive and constructive in the face of uncertainty. If a work project changes unexpectedly, they might say, ‘This is a big shift, but I think we can adapt to the new plan. Let’s figure out the best.’ Their flexibility in moments of change helps ease tension and uncertainty.

I am going to constantly update this post, so feel free to check back! Please note that some of the skills link to more detailed posts I've written on the topic (these ones are underlined because of the hyperlink). Some of them are Tumblr posts, and some of them are posts on my personal website (this site has no ads and is safe to use.) If there's a skill you want me to add to the list, let me know. If there's one you want to see described in more detail, feel free to request that one too. The ones I describe in detail tend to have examples to try and assist in understanding the skill.

Mindfulness: 

These skills focus on being present in the moment. Usually, it focuses on encouraging you to connect with yourself and others. 

Some mindfulness skills are:  What Skills:

Observe - Observe what is happening without reacting or adding commentary. For example, you might listen to the sounds around you and listen to what those sounds are without adding any additional comments. The goal is to focus on the here and now. 

Describe - When a feeling or thought arises, describe what is taking place to yourself, and label your feelings.. Let them go and don't dwell on them (don't judge them).

Participate - Fully immerse yourself in the activity and don't focus on other things.

How Skills

Effectively: Focusing on what works rather than focusing on what should happen, and what's right or fair.

Non-Judgmentally: This is about observing something, acknowledging it and then letting it go without attaching any opinions, judgements or guilt to it. Even if you have a judgmental thought, once you observe that thought, you let it go without beating yourself up for having it.

One-Mindful- This is the act of focusing on one thing at a time. This is being fully present in the moment with your focus on only one thing. 

Why Skills

Wise Mind - The goal of this skill is to balance your emotional mind and your reasonable mind. This link also brings you to a worksheet I made.

Tolerance:

These skills focus on surviving an immediate emotional crisis. 

ACCEPTS - Focuses on distracting with: Activities, Contributing, Comparisons, Emotions, Pushing away, Thoughts, Sensations

Grounding - The goal of grounding is to get you in the here and now. This can be especially helpful for overwhelming emotions, anxiety, panic, flashbacks and other situations. See the 5-4-3-2-1 method here.

Pros/Cons - Describe the behaviour you are trying to avoid. Consider the positive consequences (pros) of avoiding that behaviour. Consider the negative consequences (cons) of giving into the urge for that behaviour. Remember consequences from past times acting on those urges, and consider whether they would be pros or cons of doing it again. This can also be used to decide between two actions (or more).  This link also has a worksheet.

Radical Acceptance - The goal of radical acceptance is to accept our feelings, even the negative ones, and not push them down.

RESISTT - This skill is meant to help deal with overwhelming emotions. Reframing the situation. Engage in a distracting activity. Someone else. Intense sensations. Shut it out. Think neutral thoughts. Take a break. 

Self Soothing: These are techniques that involve using one or more of the five senses to provide comfort or pleasure to ourselves.

STOP - Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed Mindfully

TIPP - Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing, Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Urge Surfing: The goal of urge surfing is to "ride the wave" until the urge passes.

Emotion:

These skills focus on understanding the function of emotions. 

ABC - Accumulate positive emotions/experiences by actively doing things we will enjoy (eg. watch a movie, go window shopping), Build mastery in new skills (eg. playing an instrument, doing a puzzle), Cope ahead by planning for events we expect will be difficult (eg. a job interview, an upcoming social event).  (See this post for a more detailed explanation of Cope Ahead.)

Check the facts - This is about examining your feelings in a situation and the facts of that situation, and rationally considering whether your feeling response (and the intensity of it) is reasonable given the facts.

Opposite action - Recognize your emotional response to a situation and the action you instinctively wish to take as a reaction to it, and instead do whatever is the opposite of that action (for instance, going out and doing something positive when you feel like staying in and dwelling on something making you sad).

PLEASE - treat PhysicaL illness, balance Eating, avoid mood-Alerting drugs, Sleep,  Exercise. 

Interpersonal: 

These skills focus on getting what you need from other people, building healthier relationships and communication styles, and dealing with boundaries and toxic relationships. ​

DEAR MAN - Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, stay Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate 

FAST - Be Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, be Truthful

GIVE - be Gentle, act Interested, be Validating, keep an Easy manner