an utter lack of creativity

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

me sitting in my la quinta inn room with my $10 million in solid gold bars

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

always remember your comic mutual is going through hell at any point ever

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

im moving arbitrarily. im just doing shit

i feel like i do 25% of what an average person does in a day and still it's too much