Uh-oh.jpg

i will play a song on repeat until it’s sick of me

taking a polly pocket dress out of my pocket with shaky hands and putting it in my mouth like a cigarette

If I was a zookeeper, I would give a spare key to every animal somewhere inside the cage. If they can figure it out, they deserve it

does getting cursed by a witch show up in drug tests

I love charcuterie. One million tiny sandwiches I made myself please

we actually cancel all the trains when it rains because we don't want them to get sick, if you even fucking care

i get so confused when social interactions r still hard for me like u mean i studied and observed for nothing??? ok sounds fake

[the most low energy you have ever seen me] we’re about to go crazy mode

oh u need an accessory to go with that sexy dress? might i suggest a random bruise on ur leg

she 🫪 on my 🫪 till i 🫪

[curls up into a ball] I can see why pillbugs use this move

ok i absolutely need to know what accents u all have pls reblog and tell me or comment or whatever I must know

my new poker strat: start tearing up after looking at my cards no matter what i got

taking my jestosterone bc i’m a fool

I will be there. Fat and wearing jorts.

Waking up in the middle of a colonoscopy to discover that the gastroenterologist is industriously constructing a model ship inside of my large intestine