Huh? What?

eyes emoji was the perfect invention for nosy people. like 👀 whats going on over here 👀👀 i just wanna know #LetMeKnow 👀👀👀

the thing is like men and men really cant be friends because the sex part does always get in the way like thats true. and i mean that like im actually dead serious about that

like have you ever seen two straight men attempt to be friends with each other but the gay sex they arent having is literally preventing them from the transformative healing power of friendship. this is real

i dont even mean this in a "they want to fuck each other" way (although many of them do and will never know it) i mean that like the fact that gay sex is even hypothetically possible between them makes it loom over their friendship like it genuinely haunts them that they could be having it. gay sex is the elephant in the room every time they attempt to be emotionally vulnerable with one another, every time they let a hug linger too long. they cannot address its existence and so there is always something in their way, preventing true connection. and that something is the gay sex. that they are not having. the elephant of gay sex

*putting my hand in the cavernous space between what you are and what you pretend to be, and wiggling it around* woah haha is there meant to be that much emptiness here? lol are you like okay bestie? omg this kind of tickles my hand does this tickle your nothing? #yournothing <3

it's okay for you to find this post sexual. I put the sensual feeling in there on purpose. you don't need to do weird posturing about it.

a friend has informed me that this post made its way to bluesky. they're putting pieces of my soul on other websites. I want to hear about it any time you see one. collect my evil screenshots, like a slenderman but I'm fat.

Hello This Is The Office Of The Specialist You Were Referred To. We Have Decided To Never Call You To Schedule An Appointment Because You Are Evil And We Do Not Accept Evil Patients

I think flinching is such a hit or miss reflex. Like yea a tiny bit of boiling water touched my hand but i dont think reflexivly throwing the water everywhere is a good defensive measure perhaps. might be even worse actually

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

ok i absolutely need to know what accents u all have pls reblog and tell me or comment or whatever I must know

when a moot changes their pfp i feel like a baby whose dad shaved his beard