Zweylakaima

12 year old me:

[WOMAN (OFF-CAMERA):] He’s gonna come sit by you.

[MAN:] That’s crazy!

[WOMAN (LAUGHING):] Try to pet him.

[MAN:] No, nah, he’s got that big-ass beak on him!

[BIRD:] Fuck you!

so a racist got utterly demolished in less than 30 seconds on the New Zealand morning news on Monday and it’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen

(clears throat deliberately) “’Janice’ says: Good morning. I’m sick of hearing that Māori need different treatment. If they don’t want to live in our society, then maybe we should put them all on an island and leave them to it.”

Male co-host: “Janice. That is LITERALLY what happened! That is the history of our country. Last I checked, Māori WERE on an island, they were left to it, and then Pākehā (Māori term for white New Zealanders) turned up and look how that worked out. But thank you very much for that brilliant insight. Goodness me. Unbelievable. Unbelievable, they actually-“

Female co-host: “Actually, you can’t even get angry, you just actually need to laugh and then screw it up and put it under the desk. Just when you thought-“

“Everybody eats began on an ordinary summer day which consisted of me playing 2k with my cousin ken polo, until we stepped outdoors with some club crackers and made friends with deer in our neighborhood. I began to record videos of me feeding the deer for fun, I thought it was completely normal and I even decided to name them since I felt we had a special connection. The videos began to gain some buzz over the course of a week, but on the third day is when things got crazy, Money’s whole family came to my backyard, this is when I established the “Deer Squad,” which consists of Money, Baby Mama, Baby Bambi, Lola, Money jr., Canela, and Tequila. I fed them powdered donuts and marshmallows at first since I had nothing nutritional in my house at the moment, but I could tell that they loved the snacks by the way they all surrounded me without fear and ate swell. I developed a love for the Deer Squad, well I guess you can say the whole world did. In just three days I gained over 150,000 followers on Instagram, and over 40,000 followers on Twitter. I was feeling truly blessed, amazed, and honestly a bit confused on how these videos went viral. But, I realized that this opened a lot of opportunities so I started selling my own merchandise named “Everybody Eats,” a phrase I use when I talk to the deer as I feed them because I treat them equally, with nice snacks and genuine love.

Meet the real leader of Finland.