𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐍

....anyway, at least you're doing well career wise, so congratulations on that. but what the fuck did you expect, zara? there were never any strings attached. we weren't together, we weren't exclusive and i don't fucking remember signing some contract that required me to provide a detailed exit interview before moving on with my life. things stopped because life happened. work happened. other priorities happened.

i can't with you right now, i.n.! i didn't and still don't have any expectations that what we did was serious or that there were any strings or that we were exclusive. but basic fucking human decency would be to, at the very least, shoot me a text. i know you've got a lot of numbers from thirsty bitches in your phone, but "life", "work" and "other priorities" shouldn't have kept you from using those little thumbs of yours to scroll through them and shoot a two word text, "we're done". or hell, if you were feeling spicy you could've even used a few more words such as, "i don't want to see you anymore". i wasn't expecting an "exit interview" or even a fucking call. we could've kept things civil, hell... even become friends despite having seen each other naked, but you went and fucked that up.

i saw that you and tyla came out to watch our set at coachella and i’m so sad that we didn’t find time to hangout after. though those two weekends were insane so i’m not going to hold it against you. what are the chances i’ll be seeing you at the amas in a couple weeks? we’re up against each other in one of the categories, i think.

girl, of course we would show up and support you guys. you're out here killing it and real women support real women. i wasn't able to attend the amas sadly, but holy shit... i was surprised i took home not one but two wins. i say this with my whole chest... you guys deserve all the flowers you've been getting. we need to link up soon though and you can tell me all about how amazing it was.

Woke up and had one of your songs playing in my head. I realized you were here on this trip so I thought I would poke you and tell you. Napa is so pretty, isn't ? @zaralarssonz

napa was amazing and a much needed break as well, but you can't just say "one of your songs"... specify please. which song? how long was it stuck there? was it just the chorus or the entire thing? i need details. and if you throw a compliment in there, i wouldn't hate that.

not sure if it's too soon to reach out, but i figured it might not hurt. i was working out the other day when "midnight sun" played on the speakers and it just made me wonder how you're doing. but yeah, you don't have to reply to this, but… i'm not even sure what the fuck to say… are you okay? ( @zaralarssonz )

i had to take a moment to just get over the fact of how unbelievably fucked up it is that you're reaching out after all this time only to ask me if i'm "okay". to answer your question, i am doing just peachy. successful world tour, good people around me, several hits out there and i look amazing, but did you expect anything else? maybe that i'd be curled up on the floor crying about the guy i was fucking ghosting me without explanation? funny how my song playing on the speaker is what it took for you to reach out after all this time and i still don't know why you ghosted.

Beyond deveestated you weren't there. I know you would have been jumping around and singing along. The crowd was so disappointing this year and you would've been so disappointed. Nothing much to report, like I said, it's boring with you. The performances were great though and Sabrina really gave it her all. Her bringing Madonna out still feels so surreal. If you headlined, who would you bring out as your special guest. I'm in London. Where are you right now?

you best believe i would've been singing and jumping all throughout the entire festival. wait, the crowd was disappointing? or are you just saying that to make me feel better? i bet it was boring without me, but i think you had a ton of fun without me, you traitor. did you save me a t-shirt at the very least? sabrina and madonna was such a queen moment and i live for the videos online, jennie. live, i tell you! uh, you? obviously. robyn because we've got to rep sweden. pinkpantheress, and maybe if i am good this year, santa would give me a chance to bring out renee rapp and demi lovato. so my performance would basically just be women supporting women all the way through. no men allowed on stage or in production. wait, london? what the hell are you doing there, girl? come spend time with me in los angeles, like... yesterday. london is all cold and rainy and doesn't include me. so i see only perks to you coming out.

Added to my list of songs I can absolutely butcher. At this rate your fans are gonna think I've got it out for you, the way I keep turning every one of your songs into a total trainwreck every time I touch them. We should do it together, a collab is way overdue. Truth is, I couldn't really be a farm boy, I'm more of a city guy, but the idea of belting out Lush Life at the top of my lungs with zero judgment? I'd like that. You wanna sit in the middle of a bunch of chickens? Be my guest, just don't come crying to me when you end up getting chased around.

see it as a challenge rather than a potential failure, because i give you full permission to butcher it, although i doubt that'll be the case. my fans are loyal, that's for sure, but i think a majority of them would love it if you covered it. if not to see you succeed, then at least for a good laugh. i will always be a city girl and i think that's why i'm intrigued by farm life, because i could never see myself living like that. i wouldn't mind sitting in the middle of a bunch of chickens, as long as it's for a day and not a lifetime.

i get that if you were referring to being in new york or california but north carolina? i'm real enough to know that my home state isn't exactly top on everyone's visit list. but when you put it like that, i get where you're coming from. not like we're talking about top vacation destinations. i love that you're getting to takeover and play these places. are you still on a break or did i fumble the shit out of this chance? i'll take any excuse always even though all you have to do is tell me to be somewhere and for you, i will in a heartbeat every single time.

okay, it's not the same as los angeles or new york, but it's still the us and i am grateful any chance i get to perform. but that's pretty much all over the world, since i love to be on stage and making every location a party. i'm still on a little break until may, so let's do a night out in los angeles asap. i feel the need to just get a little crazy and go out and pretend no real life struggles exist.

What's it going to take for me to drag you out into the night life and have you party so late, the morning rises before you go to bed? It's pathetic that it has been so ling since the two of us actually went out and did that. I miss it and you were always my partner in crime. These days, people have been stealing you away and I know you're in demand right now, but think of us little people while you're killing it on stage please. @zaralarssonz

drag me? do you know who you're even talking to? it's going to take exactly one text message that says "i'm here" and a fit check. it's actually so pathetic and depressing. you are my partner in crime forever and always, but yes tour has to come first. i've got time though? if you're ready for a night out in los angeles? i'm talking dancing on tables, stumbling home in a blacked out haze and waking up in with a rooster in the house.

don't remind me, ten years sounds insane when you put it like that, makes everything feel both really far away and weirdly close at the same time. but i'm with you, a reunion is definitely in the cards, i think we'd have way too much fun not to make it happen at some point. i'm actually between places right now, kind of bouncing around, but if you've got a few days off, you should absolutely come by, i'm in los angeles. exhausted, if anything. back in the studio definitely means we should finally make that collab happen. i feel like we've been talking about it forever, so maybe this is the moment. i get that same feeling in toronto, and yeah, LA kind of becomes that second home whether you plan it or not. i don't think i'll ever fully get used to it, and i don't really want to.

so maybe we just let our past be our past, and move on to our future? because i'd rather not walk down memory lane of all the style fails and bad performances. at some point? that sounds like a "maybe never" type of thing. nah-uh... i want a promise that we'll get together soon and hang out. whether that be in the studio, at your place or even out for a drink. i will however not be held responsible for what happens if we drunkenly get into the studio together for a collab. could be a masterpiece, could be a big fail, but i think it'd be fun either way. los angeles being my second home feels weird, but like i've made it at the same time? but i'm excited for us to get together and do something fun. it's been too long as previously concluded.