eclectic at best

ok you know what mommy’s sick and tired of your poor reading comprehension

worry not my lord, allow me to unscrew that jar for you. i would not want for you to strain your hand or break a nail. alright. hmm. HMMMM. HNNNGRGHHHHHH. HNNGGHHHH HRRRRRGHHH. AAAAAARGHHHHHHH fucking. squire fetch me my grippy gloves

I missed my chance last year. Not gonna let it happen again

heafache.

you evil evil freaks will reblog anything

did i tell y’all that one time when my friends and i were making a joke mockumentary about a fake cryptid, my sibling and i got into a really bad hospitalizing car crash and instead of delaying it we just decided to film in the hospital and also convinced my mom and dad to play roles in it as well?

Anon is the cryptid

I really can’t believe I’ve been on this hell site for 8 years

Impart me in your wisdom of ancient times

one time there was a tumblr user with the url “pizza” and she would just comment on any text post about pizza saying “omg that’s me” and then we found out she had an entire tag dedicated to saying the n word

One time somebody paid $750 for the url ‘hi’ and got deleted in less than a year for promoting weight loss scams

too much to document, but god damn we can try

Seeing that this was from 2019 is like how ancient Egypt had people who studied even more ancient versions of Egypt.

@hellsite-hall-of-fame what say you?

how many hands you got

two? don’t see how that’s relevant

that’s still four people

will smith isn’t gay. he has a wife and three beautiful, talented children

I can’t believe this post predicted the live action Aladdin genie

If we lose tumblr how will we ever replace these posts in which every reply feels like a punch in the face

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

Today was a pretty shit day. This is a nice post to see. Birthday hat tree.

I hope tomorrow is kinder. 🌱

You will make it. Just like baby tree. You HAVE to believe that.

and punishments. more punishments. surely that will help