i havent used this thing in Years.

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

Some people can rotate a cube in their mind. I can rotate multiple cubes. In my stomach. I swallowed some dice

oh fuck yum

Every post in 2014 was like this

i wish everyone following me made enough money to not feel like they were being boiled alive and had the time and energy to clean their room at their own leisure

everything in life feels so simulated and weird. idk how to describe it. not in a losing touch with reality way. im saying like literally none of this feels real and everything feels incredibly hostile. is everyone already dead or something? like what is going on

that edible you took three years ago is about to kick in

you laugh but years ago i had a massive head cold and i was sitting at a red light trying to blow my nose so hard you'd think i was giving birth through my nostril and all of a sudden i got snow drainage like that taste and the coaty throat and my gums went numb like wtf. at that point i'd been clean off the yayo for almost a dozen years like do i seriously have a weird pocket of cocaine packed far up in my sinus somewhere or wtf is happening.

the world is so beautiful