Not So Secret Life of a [Former] Mobilesuit Pilot

mind you i’m doing this shit while employed. never give up

Peeling an orange that doesn't want to be peeled is the most thankless fucking task. What in the zoo animal enrichment.

i can't cope

I once wore green cargo pants with a black hoodie in Belfast in the mid 2000s and two separate people yelled "alright there Kim Possible?"

The ancient texts were true… They DO have a reaction image for everything…

im realizing very fast that people do not in fact know that sometimes things in stories suck on purpose and it sucking is the point

Ok, so in the original Bram Stoker novel, sunlight is not lethal to Dracula. He just loses most of his powers. I'm bringing this up cuz I want a horror comedy where the hero, sensing dawn, tears off the curtains as a last-ditch effort only to have the vampire go "Aw shit, there goes most of my fancy powers. Guess I'll have to beat your ass the old-fashioned way" then proceeds to just deck the hero cuz a vampire at half-strength is still a fucking vampire.

@sulienapgwien

someone accused me of feigning a sexual attraction to spiders for clout. there's easier ways to get clout, man.....

Someone once called my 22 minute hand sewn 18th century buttonhole tutorial video "Empty, clout driven content" so I think some people will just say anything.

Had a soul-searing moment where I sat unblinking trying to figure out what a "hand sewn 18th century butthole" could be for, until I read that again.

probably the worst attitude tumblr unintentionally cultivates is "the world out there is completely dangerous for you and no one can possibly understand you, so you should isolate yourself from it and avoid interacting with it as much as possible"