have you ever suddenly + involuntarily lost consciousness
yes (fainted)
yes (head trauma)
yes (substance-induced)
yes (lack of oxygen)
yes (blood loss)
yes (multiple)
no
So this was the fairly early days of my life modelling career. Before I learnt that locking your knees in a standing pose, especially for someone like me with horrific blood circulation meant all your blood would pool downwards and you'd end up dropping like a soggy towel in a porn movie. Rookie mistake.
So anywho I was modeling for a first year uni art class. Stood like a classical greek statue on stool, stark bollocks naked. I get a woozy feeling in my head one minute and the next I'd slammed onto the concrete floor completely unconscious. You know the type uni art classes always have, hard, cold, covered in 50s years worth of art materials.
I woke up to a very panicky art tutor stood over me waving a banana in my face insisting over and over I eat. (That image is never going to leave me.) He thought I'd skipped breakfast like a proper bohemian and decided my blood sugar needed seeing to immediately. So there I was, laid on the floor, naked, with a banana. There's a fanfic plot in there somewhere.
After taking a minute to regain myself… And consume said banana. I was back at it. The art tutor used the fact the contours of my body were now lined with paint/chalk etc from the floor as a helpful teaching aid. Like, ‘you can really see the muscle structure in the leg here, highlighted very helpfully by charcoal dust.’
It was quite the experience. Not even the weirdest one in that job either.
