Ah fuck, I contain multitudes

the ad copy says it can be used on camels. imagine someone with a camel who is struggling with camel behavior problems seeing this and thinking "hot damn, the solution to my camel misbehavior problems is CERTAINLY this dog exorcism potion"

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

cool and awesome people are supposedly calling me “my friend”

“Noble gases” are a fucking hilarious concept, I mean like just the name. Excuse me are y’all fucking SLUT SHAMING the PERIODIC TABLE

Imagine if we categorized the rest of the elements this way

(chem class) the ninth element of the periodic table, fluorine. Fluorine is the sluttiest of all elements, willing to spread its electrons for any element except argon, neon and helium. Fluorine, you fucking whore

#ratatouille

Both options convey that he's horny

How dare you be funnier than me on my own post

people have lots of pet peeves with guys being/being called grunglers. i dont care abt any of that. my annoyance is that in the original tweet the guy himself was not the grungler, the messed up dark souls character he made while on call with strange transsexuals was the grungler. ur all misusing the term

grungler's monster

taylor swift invited a guy who owns and operates an ice detention center to her wedding swifties can pack it up forever now your bitch is awful

yeah i hate concentration camps because i hate women you caught me

today i learned that the finnish word for ‘hazardous waste’ is ongelmajäte, which can also translate as ‘problematic garbage’ and my roommate and i immediately agreed this is a word that belongs on tumblr.

Your fave is ongelmajäte

in german it’s Sondermüll which means special trash and that too belongs on tumblr

One man’s ongelmajäte is another man’s sondermüll.

Are you a badass enough of a motherfucker to give me a hug

"i feel besquintled", said no one ever. because that's not a word.