side note, teaching myself to pronounce that last one felt like learning a new fucking language
hey so uh next year will be a decade of dobonhonkeros. how about that shit huh.
Happy ten year anniversary of this post.

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side note, teaching myself to pronounce that last one felt like learning a new fucking language
hey so uh next year will be a decade of dobonhonkeros. how about that shit huh.
Happy ten year anniversary of this post.

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okay but there HAD to have been some nerds on Stratt’s Vat who believed with all their hearts that Tau Ceti was resistant to Astrophage specifically because of intelligent aliens living there who’d Fixed The Problem, right??
to some extent, maybe even Yao and Ilyukhina and DuBois and the backup crew had that possibility floating around in the backs of their minds. did they spend their off-hours indulging in sci-fi that featured First Contact situations, just in case? when Stratt went on her epic pirating spree, did she take care to ensure that the swiped software included user-friendly, good-quality language programs that could hypothetically help three non-linguists communicate with speakers of a non-Earth-based language?
(which would make it extra funny, if those programs were on the Hail Mary but Grace just… didn’t find them right away, if he even thought to look for them at all. so he MacGyvered a ‘translator’ together using the tech he was already familiar with. and then much later, like 2 months before the Hail Mary reached Erid, when Grace had already suffered through YEARS of an Eridian-as-a-second-language crash-course created on the fly by an engineer with no particular background in teaching a language… Grace finally stumbles upon a “Translating a totally-unknown language from scratch for dummies :)” guidebook buried in the ship’s computer, and he has to take a moment to go bang his head on a lab table for fifteen minutes.)
and when the beetles made it back to Earth, if the relevant footage/data was actually shared far enough to reach Project Hail Mary’s supporters of the “Tau Ceti wasn’t dimming because the resident Tau Cetians fixed it” theory (as opposed to knowledge of intelligent alien life being ultra-mega-classified and locked down HARD)…
well. I imagine that at least ONE fight broke out while trying to settle the outcomes of decades-old betting pools. because yes, there WAS in fact one (1) intelligent alien lifeform hanging out at Tau Ceti! but no, it wasn’t technically a Tau Ceti alien, per se. but yes, Earth’s solution to the Petrova Problem *was* ultimately brought to them by alien science + one Viewer Like You™ working together! but no, the *original* reason Tau Ceti wasn’t dimming was NOT a direct result of intelligent aliens having already intervened. but yes, Tau Ceti was protected from the Astrophage by the direct efforts of native alien lifeforms (the Taumoebae)! but no, the aliens combating the Astrophage weren’t intelligent aliens. and so on and so forth.
#of course from a certain point of view - the ultimate winner of the only bet that mattered was Eva Stratt#because she put all her chips on Grace and oh boy did that pay off in the end
remember that guy that had a single auditory hallucination that told him he had a brain tumor and the exact location and then he went to the doctor and it was fucking right
Source
[Full text] A difficult case: Diagnosis made by hallucinatory voices
December 1997
DOI:10.1136/bmj.315.7123.1685 Authors: Ikechukwu Obialo Azuonye (Oxleas NHS Foundation Trust)
Introduction
A previously healthy woman began to hear hallucinatory voices telling her to have a brain scan for a tumour. The prediction was true; she was operated on and had an uneventful recovery.
No previous illnesses
Born in continental Europe in the mid-1940s the patient settled in Britain in the late 1960s. After a series of jobs, she got married, started a family, and settled down to a full time commitment as a housewife and mother. She rarely went to her general practitioner as she enjoyed good health and had never had any hospital treatment. Her children had also been in good health.
In the winter of 1984, as she was at home reading, she heard a distinct voice inside her head. The voice told her, “Please don't be afraid. I know it must be shocking for you to hear me speaking to you like this, but this is the easiest way I could think of. My friend and I used to work at the Children's Hospital, Great Ormond Street, and we would like to help you.”
AB had heard of the Children's Hospital, but did not know where it was and had never visited it. Her children were well, so she had no reason to worry about them. This made it all the more frightening for her, and the voice intervened again: “To help you see that we are sincere, we would like you to check out the following”—and the voice gave her three separate pieces of information, which she did not possess at the time. She checked them out, and they were true, but this did not help because she had already come to the conclusion that she had “gone mad.” In a state of panic, AB went to see her doctor, who referred her urgently to me.
I saw her at the psychiatric outpatients clinic, and diagnosed a functional hallucinatory psychosis. I offered general supportive counselling as well as medication with thioridazine. To her great relief, the voices inside her head disappeared after a couple of weeks of treatment, and she went off on holiday. While she was abroad, and still taking the thioridazine, the voices returned. They told her that they wanted her to return to England immediately as there was something wrong with her for which she should have immediate treatment. By this time, she was also having other beliefs of a delusional nature.
She returned to London and I saw her again at my outpatients clinic. By this time, the voices had given her an address to go to. Reluctantly, and just to reassure her that it was all in her mind, her husband took her by car to the address in question; it was the computerised tomography department of a large London hospital. As she arrived there, the voices told her to go in and ask to have a brain scan for two reasons—she had a tumour in her brain and her brain stem was inflamed. Because the voices had told her things in the past that had turned out to be true, AB believed them when they said that she had a tumour and was in a state of great distress when I saw her the next day.
Brain scan requested
In order to reassure her, I requested a brain scan, explaining in my letter that hallucinatory voices had told her that she had a brain tumour, that I had not, personally, found any physical signs suggestive of an intracranial space occupying lesion, and that the purpose of the scan was essentially to reassure the patient. The request was initially declined, on the grounds that there was no clinical justification for such an expensive investigation. It was also implied that I had gone a little overboard, believing what my patient's hallucinatory voices were telling her.
Eventually, after some negotiation, the scan was done in April. The initial findings led to a repeat scan, with enhancement, in May, revealing a left posterior frontal parafalcine mass, which extended through the falx to the right side. It had all the appearances of a meningioma.
The consultant neurosurgeon to whom I referred AB noted the absence of headache or any other focal neurological deficits related to this mass, and discussed, with AB and her husband, the pros and cons of immediate operation as against waiting for symptoms to appear. In the end, it was agreed to proceed with an immediate operation. AB's voices told her that they were fully in agreement with that decision.
These were the notes of the operation, carried out in May 1984: “A large left frontal bone flap extending across the midline was turned following a bifrontal skin flap incision. Meningioma about 2.5” by 1.5” in size arose from the falx and extended through to the right side. A small area of tumour appeared on the medial surface of the brain. The tumour was dissected out and removed completely along with its origins in the falx.”
AB later told me that when she recovered consciousness after the operation the voices told her, “We are pleased to have helped you. Goodbye.” There were no postoperative complications. The dosage of dexamethasone was halved every four days, and then it was stopped. She was on prophylactic anticonvulsants for six months. Antipsychotic medication was discontinued immediately after the operation, and there was no return of the hallucinatory voices or the delusions which she had expressed.
Discussion
AB telephoned me last Christmas to wish me and family a merry festive season, and to tell me that she had been completely well in the 12 years since the operation. It was this telephone call that brought this case to mind again.
It is well known that intracranial lesions can be associated with psychiatric symptomatology. But this is the first and only instance I have come across in which hallucinatory voices sought to reassure the patient of their genuine interest in her welfare, offered her a specific diagnosis (there were no clinical signs that would have alerted anyone to the tumour), directed her to the type of hospital best equipped to deal with her problem, expressed pleasure that she had at last received the treatment they desired for her, bid her farewell, and thereafter disappeared.
I presented her case at a conference later that year. AB attended and was closely questioned by several people about the various aspects of her experience. The audience was split down the middle. People who would be called X-philes today rejoiced that what had happened to her was a clear instance of telepathic communication from two well meaning people who had, psychically, found that AB had a tumour and sought to help her.
The X-phobes had a very different formulation. According to them, AB had been given the diagnosis of a brain tumour in her original country and wanted to be treated free under the NHS. Hence, they surmised, she had made up the convoluted tale about voices telling her this and that. But AB had lived in Britain for 15 years and was entitled to NHS treatment. Besides, she had been so relieved when the voices first disappeared on thioridazine that she had gone on holiday to celebrate the recovery of her sanity.
There was a group at the case conference who offered a different opinion. Their view was that, the total lack of physical signs notwithstanding, it was unlikely that a tumour of that size had had absolutely no effect on the patient. “She must have felt something,” they argued. They suggested that a funny feeling in her head had led her to fear that she had a brain tumour. That fear had led to her experience of hallucinatory voices. She may have unconsciously taken in more information about various hospitals than she realised, and this information was reproduced by her mind as part of the auditory hallucinatory experience. The voices expressing satisfaction with the outcome of her treatment were her own mind expressing its relief that the emergency was over. And the total disappearance of psychiatric symptoms after the removal of the tumour showed that these symptoms were at least directly related to the presence of the lesion—and may, in fact, have been produced by the lesion itself. I have obtained the patient's signed consent to publication.
rocky should be naked: an anthropological treatise
something maybe controversial that has been driving me BONKERS since the project hail mary book first came out that i finally just had to dig into my anthropology MA to bitch about:
it's fucking batshit that andy weir wrote the eridians as wearing clothes. there is no reason that eridians would ever develop something akin to human clothing.
like. do you know how long humans (not just hairy early hominin relatives of our, but straight-up anatomically modern homo sapiens) were rocking nothing but our birthday suits? LIKE NINETY THOUSAND FUCKING YEARS. HUMANS HAVE BEEN NAKED ALMOST THE WHOLE TIME WE'VE BEEN HUMANS, and we're famously leaky hairless apes, not hard-carapaced crab spiders with piston joints who live in boiling ammonia.
Thank you for this rant! I find that people who don’t have at least a hobbyist interest in fiber arts don’t really THINK about textiles in fiction, or their implications. Now I admit I haven’t read the PHM book yet (although I intend to), but when I learned via tumblr that Rocky wears a shirt in the book, my first question was: what fiber is it made of, and how is that fiber processed? Where did that shirt COME from? Is that ever mentioned in the book? Is it some filament form of xenonite or some other metal?
The final trailer.
I want to see this get an Oscar nomination and make A GAZILLION BUCKS.
"I don't pay you to tink you taw. I pay you to tee."
"I did! I did taw!"
"What did you tee? What did you taw?"
If this doesn't get nominated for best animated feature film and at least several other categories.... well, I will be very upset of course.
I'm crying with laughter, I can't wait to see this movie. TAKE MY MONEY
@foolishmortal THANK YOU you're so right
Everyone clearly had a blast being a part of this and their work deserves appreciation! I am going to be very obnoxious about this movie for the foreseeable.

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Message to all Americans: you BETTER NOT have brought BURGER in your SUITCASE
I’ve been thinking about them lately… Shakra doesn’t really fit on Hornet’s little bed, but she’s making it work.
“everyone is mad at me and they just won’t tell me” —> “no one has said anything about being mad at me and i haven’t done anything to warrant being mad at so if someone is silently fuming about me and not saying anything that’s their problem and actually quite weird of them and i can effortlessly move on with my life”
this took SUCH a huge deal of unlearning because, like so many of you, i came out of a home where being quietly in trouble WAS the default state, and i DID grow up not just with the assumption but borderline religious conviction that Everyone Is Mad At Me, I Am Bad, I Must Exist In A Constant State of Attempting to Pacify The Natural Rage I Inspire In Everyone. and no it actually turns out that my family are the freaks . and yours are too
“this isn’t true because i DEFINITELY silently fume at people in the hopes they’ll figure out what they did and apologize” that’s not good. you shouldn’t do that
“this isn’t true because the ex-friendship that traumatized me ended explosively after they were mad at me and never told me why” that’s not good. they shouldn’t be doing that
“i don’t think this is true because my current friend group is constantly icing me out until i figure out what ive done to upset them and properly apologized without being told” hey thats not good. they should not be doing that
if the peacefulness of your relationship with someone (familial, romantic, friendly, anything) can be destroyed by effective communication/asking them for effective communication, you have got to get out of there. if you can’t get out of there, you’ve got to throw away any ideas about what that person thinks of you because they have their own shit to figure out before they can accurately read anyone else
baby photos

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I fuck with this
[image description: screenshot of writing formatted as a question and answer exchange. headline of piece is: The Proposal to Raise Every Boy as a Girl. (author not listed)
Q. You want to raise every boy as a girl? Yes.
Q. Why? A boy will learn to hate girls as long as he is raised in such a way where he is treated as better, and superior to, his girl peers, whenever he is cruel to girls. So, instead, we raise boys as girls.
Q. What if they say they are not a girl, and want to be acknowledged as boy? Then you know they are a boy, so you must make sure to understand them as boy, and not a girl.
Q. What does it mean to be 'raised as a girl'? That's up for you to decide. The only difference is that you should not raise boys any differently than you raise girls, since you raise every boy as a girl.
Q. Girls and boys are raised in specific ways for specific purposes, so it does not make sense to raise boys as girls. If you raise every boy as a girl, then there is no being which is not raised as a girl, so anyone raised as a girl necessarily must learn to do anything and everything to grow up, without restrictions on tasks, labours, or interests.
Q. But boys and girls are different. All two girls are different, and raising girls in one specific way destroys this individuality in favour of moulding girls to serve the same master. Still, the girls resist to live life on their own terms. If girls can be raised such that they know they can do anything they want, including not being girls, so too will boys raised as girls.
Q. Why not raise every girl as a boy? Because if a girl does not exist among boys, then the girl is made.
Q. Why not raise girls and boys as themselves? The self must be made in a world where girls and boys can first and foremost be themselves. One step towards this goal is to raise every boy as a girl.
Q. The way people raise girls is cruel, so why would you raise boys with that cruelty? If you raise girls with cruelty, then you should stop being cruel to girls.
/end description]
i think we are long overdue for a game that does the reverse of 90s first person shooters and actively makes fun of the player for picking the hard difficulty
heres kinda what i mean
everyone i've talked to about this has been completely unaware so: if you didn't know already, there's going to be a solar eclipse, with totality or coverage of 90% or more in some places, over a lot of europe, on august 12th 2026. in the uk it will start just after 6pm, and the maximum will be at 7:13pm.
here is a map of the path of the eclipse (from timeanddate)
get eclipse glasses if you want to look at it. it is not safe to look at through sunglasses. ok informative post over o7
mostly missing me but i know a bunch of folks that are right in the path 🥰 enjoy it for me, my lovelies!
reminding everyone to wear sunscreen because the sun is a deadly laser: 😁😊
having to spend 10 minutes slathering yourself in grease just to safely be outside in the sun for 20 minutes. because the sun is a deadly laser: 😐👎
imagine you had a friend who constantly made jokes at the expense of something you loved. they're never funny, but they seem to expect you to laugh even though the punchline is just, "this thing you love sucks ass". it's not even really a joke, there's nothing funny about it, you can tell that they genuinely actually believe it. but they insist it's just a joke!
no matter what the situation is, they're always bringing the social interaction to a screeching halt with these jokes. nobody ever wants to participate in this joke with them. nobody agrees with the premise. nobody ever knows what to say afterwards, it's just an awkward moment and a subject change. but they just keep doing it.
you have to stop with the self-deprecatory "humor", it's not fun for anyone including you.
#actual advice: switch to self-aggrandizing humor #have the biggest ego in the world even if it's fake #does wonders
as the smartest and most beautiful woman in the world, I can confirm this
Self aggrandizing humor saves lives. I’m an authority on this since I’m legitimately the coolest girl in the world.
Genuinely, take this nugget of wisdom to heart! Have unassailable self-confidence and pride. Say it out loud, so you can hear your own voice. Say it until it's true!!

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Okay so people have been voting in this post to hear about my mom's Kronks, and I finally got the time so here we go.
First thing to know about my mom is that she's kind of a jackass and extremely self obsessed. She somehow embodies all the standards of toxic masculinity while still managing to slip some toxic femininity in there too, and a tenuous little dash of actual feminism. Second thing is that, on paper, she sounds Pretty Fucking Cool.
This woman is everything an alpha bro aspires to be. She's well educated, spent her 20s working as a wildlands firefighter, went on to teach martial arts, does her own construction and landscaping projects by hand, decently skilled at all kinds of handyman shit like plumbing/carpentry/electrical installation/car maintenance/whatever, really big on wilderness survival and actually has the skills to back it up, the works. This is a woman who wears homemade dresses to town and keeps a chainsaw in the back of her car in case she needs to clear fallen trees out of the road on the way.
Point is, there's a certain kind of man who really does want to learn those practical skills and feel like a Real Hard Working Man, but isn't into all the manosphere type bullshit that they run into with most men tryna achieve that. These men get totally infatuated with my mom.
This isn't a sexual thing as far as I know. The basis of the relationship is that the one thing my mom loves more than telling people how great she is, is other people telling her how great she is; and nothing boosts her ego more than a dedicated apprentice who wants to be taught everything she knows, follows her every instruction, and performs manual labor for free (and can be put down on the list of people who's every success is now due to her). And on the guy's end, I guess the one-on-one mentorship fills a void. I gotta admit, despite some of them being my classmates, I don't really interact with the Kronks much during this process so I'm not sure exactly why they do it.
Anyway the result is that she never goes more than a few months without ending up with one or two strong guys following her around to help with projects and learn new skills. I only talk to her a couple times a month these days and really don't keep track of them, so sometimes she'll mention what [guy's name] did recently and I just have to assume it's either a new one or I forgot the latest one's name again. Every time I visit her there's a new one that I meet in passing.
They range in age from her peers, to literally my peer's younger siblings, but they're always chipper, friendly, and either buff or working on building muscle. And they're always absolutely dedicated to her. I'm not even clear on what exactly their role is at any given time either. Like, sometimes they're helping out with work, sometimes they're just doing errands for her or trading fruits and supplies and shit. They're just, Present, at any given moment when she needs something. And there's always a new one.
However! One big difference between her and Yzma is that apparently she keeps in contact with the old Kronks after they leave the nest. Again, I don't end up knowing much at all about these guys, just that they cycle out regularly and I stop seeing them around. Not my business.
The day I learned otherwise was after a massive storm hit the island and toppled trees all around her property, blocking the road out and effectively trapping her there with no access to groceries or gas or anything. Now, I didn't see the damage in person, but I know her place is surrounded by fuckoff huge eucalyptus with trunks 3-4 feet (over a meter) in diameter and branches twice the length of a car who like to fall over at the slightest inconvenience, as well as a lot of smaller debris, and tends to get flooded with mud when it rains —more than she can manage with just her trusty chainsaw and raw donkeykong strength alone. She needed some helping hands.
A Lot of helping hands.
So, naturally, she summons a Kronk. But one Kronk isn't nearly enough for all of that shit. She summoned every Kronk on the island.
They managed to clear all the major damage in a single day, and had time to pose for a truly iconic image.
Unfortunately this is the only other story that I have photographic proof of, so from here on out you'll just have to take my word for it. Feel free to comment on the original post with which story you want me to share next, and thanks for being interested in my sitcom moments <3