then i would have known

We've got a new employee and I'm not sure if he's and asshole or just an extrovert.

Oh, hey, I forgot I complained about this asshole here! Turns out he was an asshole, a dick, and a liar!

Wake up babe, new meta layer just dropped

Question. Why are y'all doing this in March

To make sure we get the meme jn the fridge to dethaw in time.

Sure I’ll reblog that

about to go slay the minotaur of cretes haha lol catch me celebrating like crazy on the ship after this

it's so dark in here

this sucks. i can hear things dripping from the ceiling to the floor. all i have is uhhh a torch a sword and some thread. dude the thread isn't even mine i have to give it back after this. someone remind me to give the thread back lol

wait there's something on the floor over there lol. I'll go check it out be right back

i feel sick

listen i knew. i knew, okay? people died here i knew that but gods. some of the bones even have coins for charon near them. what kind of monster is this

that noise was NOT water.

horns. it has horns. it has a cow's hide on its chest and pale skin on its legs and two feet but it doesn't trot and it doesn't walk. it mouths things silently like it's going to talk but all that comes out is a roar. it doesn't sound like a man it sounds like. like. it hasn't seen me yet. it's eating. what is it eating??????

there's no way i can fight this. i didn't even bring a coin for myself. oh gods. oh gods I'm a coward. I'm a coward

no fuck wait I'm not a coward. none of you would do this okay listen none of you have even seen a minotaur before. I'll tell you what it's fucking like. that thing is taller than me a OH FUCK

I GOT IT i got it i slashed it on the leg and ran away again i got it. i got it oh my gods. I'm out of breath. oh gods

i have to kill it. i have to kill it don't i. even if i manage to find the thread and go all the way back to the entrance they're just going to send me back in. or send someone else in and i don't want it to be someone else. i have to get out of here. have to finish the job

is that. is that crying

who's crying? that's definitely not a roaring sound it's like. it's more like howling? but it sounds like someone else. what the fuck is happening I'm going to go look

oh

his eyes are like mine. i looked out from behind the wall and the minotaur was just kneeling there holding his leg. i looked at the minotaur and he was crying and his eyes were like mine and they were brown. and they were scared.

i can't do this.

i can't. do it. i said i was going to but i don't think I'm strong enough for this. but i have to. fuck

would it be a mercy? has he seen the sun since he was born? has he felt the breeze? has he talked to anyone? held anyone's hand? how can he even cry with the head of a bull?

well. i guess the question is. why shouldn't he cry

when the minotaur gets up he's probably going to want to kill me and i don't blame him. i need to get out of here before then. i

where's the thread.

there's no other exit. they won't let me out of here unless someone is dead. oh gods.

what was her name? ariadne. ariadne gave me that thread. so i have to give it back to her. i have to make it out alive. please

please.

fuck this.

i need to get out of here. i have to. i have to get out of here. please please nobody can hear me except for the minotaur and i don't want to die but he doesn't want to die either i need to get out of here. i have to do this please oh gods. please forgive me I'm so sorry. i have to do this i don't want to die I'm sorry i have to get out of here and if i do this PLEASE I HAVE TO

I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. i. the ground here is too cold. too solid. i can't bury you. i don't even have any coins. i can't put you in an urn. i can't carry you out. I'm sorry.

i'm going go to now.

If you had to sing a child to sleep RIGHT NOW what would you sing and it CANT BE a lullaby it has to be a regular song

I first reblogged this in January, and here my ass is in March 2020 self-quarantined at home.

Y'all, we as a community have got to get better at dodgeball if we’re gonna keep tempting fate like that.

12 days left until the breadiversary, we’d better make sure we have the ingredients on hand!

It’s today!

It’s today!!