Cuddle with mama!!

got curious because idk how well-known this is internationally so:

That last post I reblogged got me thinking again about how people can’t separate their idea of manhood from violence.

My cishet dad has often told me that he found feminist theory to be very freeing. It told him that yes men can be gentle and caring. Yes men can be sensitive. Being a man means what you want it to mean.

A “real man” is a myth.

I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?

And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.

Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path.

I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.

Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.

One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him.

In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them.

Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.

You really gotta learn to take up your space, ladies, because this is what it’s about. Too many of us are conditioned to take up as little space as possible and there are men that actively use that. It’s why those men expect you to step aside, and it’s also why they know manspreading works. They count on the woman next to them to move to one corner of her seat. If you instead take up all of your seat the manspreading will soon stop because the manspreader will feel uncomfortable with his leg touching your leg. Yes, it will be uncomfortable for you too but that will quickly be overcome by the satisfaction of having your seat all to you.

Fascinating glimpse into the american world. Here in Germany, everybody, men or women, just take a half step to pass each other. I have very rarely run into anyone. And I could not tell if there was a gendered pattern. If you don’t move, I would just assume you were distracted and didn’t pay attention to your surroundings.

here's where to find it on windows 10