Had to stop an old man from shoplifting today and I still feel guilty 😔
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@weeee
Had to stop an old man from shoplifting today and I still feel guilty 😔

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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personalized ads are so funny to me
'hey we've been spying on you and tracking your every move. it's a culmination of state of the art technology and an unprecedented invasion of consumer privacy. a room full of men with made up jobs bent their will toward decades of constructing this system, defending it in court, and tirelessly innovating new ways to aggregate more data about you'
and the end result is
'yeah so uh we saw that you recently bought a car. so here's an ad for that car'
like no i'm good actually. you might be aware that i already have one
“Every Pokemon is someone’s favourite” I’m making a spreadsheet to see if this is true. Reblog with your favourite Pokemon in the tags.
Here’s the spreadsheet in-progress
Ok, mother of GOD that's a lot of responses and I am but one man with Excel. I'll update these ASAP but also some rules:
A Pokemon only counts for itself, not its evolution line.
A Pokemon with multiple forms (like Zygarde) will only be counted for the specified form. A Pokemon with multiple appearances (like Spinda, Vivillon, Sylvally, etc.) count for all their appearances.
I'm literally doing this as a testament to my own depression that not everyone is lovable, so add that to the weight of this post's meaning.
People will be so mean to teenagers do you literally not remember what it was like to be sixteen. Every time I talk to a teenager I feel I should hold their hands and tell them I think they're one of the bravest people on the planet just for choosing to endure but I don't because I don't want to be creepy.
you're a magical girl now, the last thing you ate is your magical girl name is it good?
yes
no
it's perfect
it's awful
it's funny, i love it
results

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Heartwarming story: Little girl doesn’t have to do anything to fund her dad’s surgery because his expenses are covered by his country’s universal healthcare.
Human determination: Man bikes 18 miles to work every morning because he wants to and not because he can’t afford a car and would be fired if he’s late.
Spirit of Brotherhood: Neighbors host housewarming party for elderly resident who doesn’t need help in paying rent because his pension is more than enough.
SO INSPIRING: Local middle school students bake dozens of cupcakes because their home economics class is doing a baking unit. Their school is fully funded with everything they need.
This feels like calibrating my normal detector
help I just discovered ottawa’s waluigi
everyone clap for friends that are animals. make it so easy to send u any post ever. bunny on the dash ? oh good thats going to my bunny friend. deer? ahhh yes. mny friend deer my good friend the real deer. you get this . and every time theyre like yesss #my me

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gooodbyee 200 dollars helloo piece of pleastic
it is genuinely bewildering to me that adult human beings do not know this but if you are mean to people they will not like you. like tbh they are probably also not going to like you if you are mean to other people but they are definitely not going to like you if you are mean to them. it doesn’t matter if you are funny or if you can use r/aita rules to prove that you are in the right. people simply do not enjoy being treated like shit.
The most obsession inducing trait a character can have for me is knowing somewhere in their heart That They Are A Bad Kid
This isn't necessarily literal. It can apply to characters who aren't children too. But there's something about characters who are either certain of the fact, or terrified of the possibility, that they are just fundamentally wrong and bad at their core
It is also important to me that it is not true. No one is fundamentally broken and evil.
starting to think some of yall arent serious bout finding beauty in the grotesque
they cant even find beauty in fat ppl

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noted icon and legend, Leilani Clarke
It is always morally correct to knee a cop in the balls
One time my grandfather picked me up from the airport and was driving me home and asked if I wanted to stop at McDonald's. And I was like sure, we can stop at the one in [town].
And he was like "we don't need to go to [town], we'll just go to the one in your town. And I said my town doesn't have a McDonald's. And he was like "okay, we'll go to the closest one". And I was like right, the one in [town]. And he said "that's twenty minutes away from your house, you really don't have one closer?" And when I confirmed that he said "well, it doesn't have to be McDonald's. It can be whatever fast food place is in your town." And I was like there is no fast food in my town. There is no food in my town period unless you want to stop for gas station hot dogs. And he was like "that doesn't make any sense. Then what do you do when you need food?" And I said I drive to [town]. And he said "every single time you need food or groceries?" And I said yeah, that's sort of how the fixed nature of buildings work. And then we drove in silence for ten minutes while this man tried to wrap his head around the fact that I had to drive twenty minutes to town to go grocery shopping.
Anyway a lot of you remind me of this experience pretty much every time the urban/rural divide comes up on this website.
I'm really enjoying that this is picking up notes because most of them are people like "oh yeah, 20 minutes isn't even that bad, I have to drive an hour to my [town]" and then there's a handful of people freaking out like "oh my god, are Americans okay??? Shouldn't your government be doing something about this????"
Idk what the government is gonna do about it man, I think me and my 6 neighbors within walking distance are just gonna have to keep driving to [town]
Reading through the notes on this is wild because they seem to fall into three groups:
Yeah, same.
I flatly refuse to believe such a place is possible. You're all making this up.
I wouldn't want to live in a place like that, so obviously nobody would, and it should be illegal for these places to exist.