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@voguesbrokenhearts

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Everyone is just disappointing me at the moment.
Moving out.
It used to be my biggest dream.
Why do I feel so sad? Why am I scared?
I think I might not be able to let go.
All of these memories make me sad, I feel like my childhood is coming to an end.
But I know I won’t be happy if I stay here forever.
Moving out is the healthiest decision.
It is the right thing to do.
Because people need to grow and explore the world by themselves.
Moving out is growing. Moving out is brave. It’s giving yourself an opportunity to design your own world. Your own thing.
The worst part when having trouble with your friends is when you just can’t understand what you did wrong. You feel empty because you gave them your everything and ended up with being hurt.
I feel so detached from myself lately.

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The make us angry kids and then ask us why we have sudden outbursts.
I love how some things just bring me peace. For some people that might sound bizarre but sometimes it’s the only feeling I have. Peace when I see a beautiful sunset and my favorite song is playing in the background. Peace when I wake up and the sunlight shimmers through my curtains. Peace when it’s raining so strong that everything just stops for a minute cause I can’t hear my own thoughts.
Just thinking about how I’m TRYING to choose happiness but it doesn’t seem like it wants to choose me.
Everytime I think I’m completely fine it just hits me out of the blue and I feel like I’m back to where I tried so hard to get out of. What gives me hope and tells me I’m okay is that after all this time I got myself to stand up. Over and over again. Everytime.
And now I realize that it’s okay to feel like the world stopped spinning for me.
It’s okay to feel like extrem shit for days.
The only important thing is that I acknowledge that I’m human and I have bad- even horrible days. Nonetheless I’m stronger than anything and can work on my attitude.
I can choose to see everything on the bright side. To start building a self care routine. To start doing habits which will help me build the best version of myself. And on some days I won’t have the strength. And that’s okay. It’s normal.
It’s human!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Being here is so much harder than I thought. This time there’s no escaping my thoughts or my actions. But you know what? I don’t want it to end here. I don’t want to stop in hell. I want to live and find out what’s out there. I want to feel alive and no bad feeling or depression is going to stop me. And neither should it do you.
love is the strongest feeling in the 🌎
what can I do if I’m to scared to die but to broken to live?
I don’t know how much I can take. I used to think that I’m a strong person but having you hate me broke me. I wish I could die but I don’t want to hurt anyone by leaving and I know that the day I’m leaving school and start a new life I will feel better. At least I hope so

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my former best friend
she used to be so much kinder but ever since she felt a bit left out by me and became friends with the "popular" kids she's such a bitch to me. I mean she always tries to put me down and make funny "jokes" about me but and this really hurts me because I didn't do anything. To her other friends she's always like "u deserve the world", "I love you so much girl" etc. and this really pisses me off because in the past when she had trouble with her family (her mom was suicidal) it was me and my family who helped her with anything she needed and I feel like she doesn't appreciate it anymore.
tbh I'm kinda sure no one will ever read this but I guess I'm going to write about the things which keep me up at night or let me think