angelic feline princess who does no wrong

Possessed demon blade she recently acquired (B): “Yeah? What’s it matter to you?”

A: “You, the cleaver of 10,000 souls, the blade which relished in the blood of armies and its wielder alike, and the judgemental sword that won’t stop mocking my techniques. Why would I ever take a bath with you?”

B: “A blade is an extension of the self, you should never let yourself be parted with it. And even if you’re a lackluster swordswoman, we’ve already made enough enemies that you cannot risk an opportunity to be ambushed while unarmed.”

A: “Even if I did buy that, why do you want this anyway?”

B: “As miserable as traveling with you has been, it is at least slightly more entertaining than being abandoned in a crumbling ruin for hundreds of years. I don’t want you dying until we run into someone who at least knows the basics of the sword arts.”

A: “You expect me to believe it’s not just because you’re a pervert who wants to see me naked?”

B: “What?! As if I would have any interest in you. If you must know it’s because temperature is one of the few things I can still feel, and I find the warmth to be pleasant. Yet you aren’t skilled enough for me to bathe in the fresh blood of your enemies, so hot water will have to do for now.”

A: …

B: “Besides, I’m a sword, what would I even get out of seeing you naked anyway?”

A: …

B: “And even when I was alive I was a woman who used public baths often, your naked body doesn’t even interest me in the slightest.”

A: …

B: “…my limited perception of the world around me means I can’t really ‘see’ anything anyway.”

A: “You sure have a lot of excuses on hand.”

B: “…it would also help to strengthen our bond as weapon and wielder?”

Setsuna: So…?

Ai: What?

Setsuna: Aren’t you going to comment on my technique earlier today?

Ai: Tch, Ai would if there was anything worth commenting on.

Setsuna: That’s strange, cause I distinctly recall you saying my opponent was “a much better swordsman than me”, and that “you were looking forward to finally being carried by someone with some semblance of talent.”

Ai: That Ai did. And Ai stands by it.

Setsuna: Did you not notice his head being cleanly separated from his body when I swung you through his neck.

Ai: Yes. If it could Ai would have immediately shed tears that Ai has to remain in your hands for even longer now.

Setsuna: To be clear, you are sticking with your stance that the now-dead man who I bested in a clash of blades has more talent with a sword than I do.

Ai: That Ai is. You only won because you had Ai and he did not.

Setsuna: That’s too bad. If you admitted you were wrong I would’ve let you in the bath tonight.

Ai: …

Setsuna: Oh well, what a shame.

Ai: ….fine. Ai admits it, you are the superior swordswoman. The proof is written in blood as you walked away with your life.

Setsuna: Thank you, now was that so hard?

Ai: Still, Ai refuses to let someone as unskilled as you gloat about your victories. Now about the bath-

Setsuna: I only said I would have let you, but that opportunity is gone.

Ai: How dare-

Setsuna: But, unlike some stubborn weapons I know, I’m willing to show you some leniency here.

Ai: Thank you. Now how about we go-

Setsuna: We? I never said I’d let you bathe with me. You can have a turn when I’m done.

Ai: …

Setsuna: Hmm? Why are you pouting? I thought you just wanted to feel the sensation of the hot water?

Ai *grumbling*: Ai eagerly awaits the day in which Ai can drink in the warm blood pouring forth from your flesh while you struggle desperately to take your last breath.

Setsuna: …does that mean you don’t want the ba-