Joe Fermaint

(Or, how Tumblr just saved my ass)

I saw a PSA recently about a scam going around with spoofed official numbers calling and asking for information, and how you should hang up and call back using the correct number rather than just go along with what the caller is telling you. But this is Tumblr, so I'll never be able to find the post again.

I decided to make my own, because this literally just happened to me an hour ago. Hopefully my story can spread some more awareness and save other asses the way mine was saved.

Around 7:30pm tonight (Friday), I got a phone call from a 1-800 number. I almost didn't answer it, then I saw it was 1-800-465-4___, and I recognized that as the start of the CIBC phone number, so I picked up.

Me: Hello?

Guy: Hi, is this [MrsD]?"

Me: Yes.

Guy: Hi, [MrsD], this is _____ from CIBC, how are you tonight?

I thought, okay, this is a sales call. Right before I'm about to sit down for dinner. Typical. Mentally, I'm already putting together an exit strategy, preparing to say no to everything and get off the phone ASAP. But then—

Guy: We've just flagged suspicious activity on your CIBC Visa card. It was an online BestBuy transaction for $980.00. Was that your transaction?

Me, flustered: Uh. What? Sorry, how much?

Guy: $980.00 at BestBuy, was that you?

Me: Oh. At BestBuy?

Guy: Yes, your card was used at a BestBuy in [town nearby]. Was that you? Did you go to [town nearby] today? You don't live in [town nearby], right?

Me: Uh. No?

Guy: Okay, so I need some information to verify this transaction.

By this point, my brain had caught on that something about this was hinky. First of all, I thought he said it was an online purchase, then he said it was in person. But maybe I'd misheard, he was talking fast. My second thought was that every other time there was a suspicious transaction, I got an automated phone call and a text message with instructions to call back. I've never had a person call me directly.

My third thought was, well, the phone number on the caller ID was right....

THEN! I remembered a Tumblr post I saw recently, and I remembered what it told me to do.

Me: I'm skeptical about this call. I'm going to call CIBC myself and look into this.

Guy: What? Ma'am, you can just tell me, I can verify—

Me: No. Thank you, but I'll call the number on the back of my card.

Guy, getting more agitated: Ma'am, if you look at the number on your card, you'll see it's the same number.

Me: You know that can spoofed, right?

Guy: Uh— but ma'am—

Me: Sorry, but I need to make sure. I'm going to call CIBC directly.

The guy kept sputtering, but I hung up on him. In that moment, I really didn't think that he was a scammer. In fact, I thought I was being paranoid and was maybe kinda rude to the guy. I wondered if I was being overcautious, and I felt a bit guilty.

I called the number on the back of my credit card, waited 15 minutes for an agent, and told him what just happened.

IMMEDIATELY—

Agent: You didn't tell him anything, did you?

Me: No. I said I wasn't in [town nearby] today, but that's it.

Agent: Good. You did the right thing by calling us, let me look into the transaction for you.

Then, a minute later:

Agent: I'm not seeing any transaction like that. There's no flags on your card, nothing suspicious at all.

Me: So it was a scam?

Agent: Yep. Entirely fake.

I was honestly surprised. I really thought that there was some kind of mix-up and that I would be apologizing to this guy for being rude to his colleague.

Looking back on it now, I can see all the telltale signs of it being a scam call:

Time of day. Early evening on a Friday, chances are people are either sitting down for dinner or in a hurry to get somewhere. In this situation, a lot people probably wouldn't think twice about giving "the bank" some information just to get off the phone. (Joke's on them, I have no life!) But the way that I reacted to his introduction did evoke the desired reaction of Ugh, what now? Leave me alone! that the scammer was banking on (pun intended).

Sense of urgency. The scammer spoke fast, threw details at me quickly, and made sure I knew that I had to give him my information right away. This honestly threw me off. It was overwhelming, and I felt concerned and a bit frantic for a few seconds until I thought about what I know about scams and what I'd just read in that Tumblr PSA.

Complete lack of empathy or understanding about my skepticism/anti-fraud precautions. The last time I had to get a new credit card number due to fraud, the agent I spoke to said things like "I know this is frustrating", "I'm sorry this is a hassle", etc. And of course the CIBC agent I spoke to tonight was immediately grateful that I'd called them directly and reassured me that CIBC would never ask for information. By contrast, the scammer was outright dismissive of my concerns and got agitated when I wouldn't just trust him right off the bat.

Emotional provocation. Similar to #2 & #3 above, the scammer was very good at making me feel things. Worried and fearful at first, then guilty about being suspicious, to the point where I actually apologized to the guy. (Granted, I am Canadian, but still!)

And finally, I cannot stress enough: the spoofed phone number. I am a pretty well-informed person. I keep up with news about scams and whatnot. I know that phone numbers can be spoofed. I've been in front of my phone when it just starts to ring and I can see the auto-dialler number appear briefly before it gets replaced with a number that has my area code. But tonight—early evening on a Friday—I was cooking dinner and my phone was across the room. It had rung several times by the time I got to it. I only picked it up because I recognized the CIBC number. And when the scammer started his spiel, the fact that the number was the same was enough for me to give him just a tiny moment of trust. Had he actually gotten past that first barrier and started requesting my information, I think I would have caught on, because people asking for sensitive information over the phone is a huge obvious red flag. I like to think I would have caught on, anyway. But maybe not! That fake number almost had me.

That said, it's normal to make friends in that space who you hang out with, outside of kink stuff. When that happens and people asked where I met my friend, my go-to line was "Spin-class," which is a very funny joke if you know me even a little. Very not my scene.

Well, funnily enough, while I was working at a homeless shelter, we had a very similar rule because of the homeless stigma. If a guest from the Shelter sees you outside of work, you don't acknowledge or approach them. They can approach you, but you don't tell whoever you're with where you know them. The guest gets to decide if they want to share that info.

Smash cut to me being out with a friend I met at the dungeon a very long time ago. I bump into a guest from the shelter who approaches me to chat. My friend asks how I know the guest, and without thinking, I blurt out "spin class" before remembering that's my go to lie for how I ment dungeon friends. These two proceed to have a conversation, neither fully understood.

Friend: ooohhhh okay i get it. Spin class! Me too. Stopped taking that class a while ago tho.

Guest. Oh for real? That's sick man, good for you! You got a good set up now?

Friend: The best!! I've taken up wood working so my furniture is all custom. Got plenty of space to do "spin" at home. It's coming together.

Guest: Hell yeah brother!!!

Friend: was really good to have my own space during the rona, but man it's lonely! I kinda miss the group dynamics.

Guest: Yeah, i heard that from my homie when he got out of "Spin class!" But it's for the best.

Friend: it can be, but its not for everybody. Can be safer to Spin in a group.

Guest: i know that. Lost a few homie to "spinning" alone. At least at the "class" you got other eyes on you.

Friend: I'm sorry to hear that! You know some elements of "Spinning" are risky but you never think anyone would get hurt. So, my buddy here still a real hard ass for safety?

Guest: oh man you dont even know. They revamped our whole fire escape plan.

Friend: Oh shit! They did that back when i was in Spin class too!

Guest: still improving the system i guess.

Friend: they still keep a bunch of robes outside in a shed so people who get out can cover up?

Guest: Yes!!!

Friend: Did you know it's their fault we have a 30 second rule!

Guest: Damn really!?! Makes sense tho, if there's a fire you gotta get out fast!

Friend: Yeah, I Never gave it much thought before they brought it up, but yeah the last thing you want is a fire when you're all tired up!

Guest: Yeah, that's true. I didn't know they came up with the rule, tho. I do like having the space between the beds clear...

Friend: Yeah it's so annoying when people block the path with their shit.

Guest: Yeah there's not enough space between beds for people to be hording shit.

Friend: Yeah! I loved that they always got people to keep their area clear.

Guest: not gonna lie i hate being told to clean up but it is better that way.

Friend: Yeah... haha.

Guest: well it was nice chatting with you brother.

Friend: you too, man! See ya around!

Guest: see ya!

Me:

@mageless

Most important: Spend the money you have on a motel. Churches probably will not actually help and shelters can be dangerous or turn you away. At a motel you have free breakfast, access to running water, and a lockable place to sleep. Do not waste money on a gym membership like the popular version of this post says to do, YMCA memberships are like $40.

2. Contact family and friends. Now is not the time to worry about being a burden. Your survival and safety comes first and that is all that matters, anyone worth having in your life will agree.

3. Start a gofundme. Even if someone can’t offer you a place to stay, they might be willing to toss out $5 so you can eat today.

4. Libraries have free wifi. Apply to any and all jobs you can think of if you aren’t already working.

5. Any home is a good home. Even if it’s a dingy apartment in a bad neighborhood. If its cheap and you can afford it, snatch it up. 

6. Pancake mix and peanut butter are filling, cheap, and last a long time.

It's important context that she had a very hard life into adulthood. Very poor family. Abusive father. Mentally ill mother. She often had to miss school as a teenager because she had to go find her mother, who would wander off for days into the woods. She also made sure her other siblings were fed, clothed, and at school while she herself was missing out on them.

I once asked her why she did so much celebrating.

She told me that people can choose to celebrate the small stuff if they want to, or not, but life was hard enough and the celebrations, no matter how small, made the other hard things easier. "If two people lead hard lives, and one of them celebrates and the other doesn't, which do you think will survive longer? Get more done? Make it farther?"

I know what I am doing is wrong

I know there is an activity that looks similar that is not wrong

it’s about the secret darkness inside you. it’s about not being able to tell if it controls you or you control it. it’s about the wrestle between who you want to be and who you need to be. the conversation between the gruesome and the uncontainable

Not in the “plunged into the fires of Mt. Doom” sense. 

Artifact repatriation.  The heroes work for an international commission aimed at reversing centuries of plunder.  Oh, sure, the adventurers of yesteryear may have had solid reasons for looting the Ancient Tomb of the Noonday King, but those justifications have passed, and the Noonday King’s regalia really should be returned home, not sitting in a foreign adventurer’s ancestral manor.

Possible adventures include:

Archaeologically respectful dungeon crawls, aimed at returning items to original context if possible

Consulting and cooperation with host museums in native cultures to provide security and academic collaboration

Liberating artifacts from foreign collections, if imperial governments or plutocrats or nobles initially refuse to return them

Realizing that an ancient conspiracy is modifying paperwork and falsifying academic reports to turn the repatriation committee into a MacGuffin delivery service for an ancient lich-king

The deadline is 9 July 2025.

Trans rights are always wavering in safety and are not stable and well protected in the UK. Please sign.

^ having the time of their life obsessing over The character^tm