The Untitled and the Descriptions

You're a biological computer piloting a mechsuit made out of meat and bone, filled with fire and ocean, make it yours.

"Go ahead and destroy the AI Data Centers Godzilla, make the people happy!!!"

May the ideology of plunder vanish, and the ideology of war will vanish too! May colonies disappear, may the exploitation of countries by monopolies disappear, and then humanity will have reached a true stage of progress! #FidelDijo #100AñosConFidel

A smart device reaches peak enshittification when feeding the cat becomes secondary to maintaining a successful connection with corporate headquarters.

The theorem states that once a company discovers telemetry, every household appliance must eventually become a remote sensor that happens to perform a useful function on the side.

A feeder used to have one job:

At 7:00, release food.

Then someone added Wi-Fi.

Then an app.

Then an account.

Then cloud services.

Then telemetry.

And finally, somewhere in the architecture diagram, the cat became an optional dependency.

This week, Petlibro suffered a major outage affecting its smart pet ecosystem.

Automatic feeders stopped feeding.

Water fountains and smart litter boxes lost functionality.

Scheduled meals that were supposedly stored locally failed to trigger for some users.

Owners of RFID and Granary feeders reported that their pets simply did not receive their scheduled food.

Which is an interesting engineering achievement.

Humanity has successfully built a food bowl that can fail because a server somewhere else is having a bad day.

Petlibro says stored feeding schedules should continue working even when the internet connection disappears.

Many customers discovered that “should” is doing quite a lot of work in that sentence.

And this is where the theorem becomes useful.

Because there is no fundamental reason an automatic feeder needs the cloud to execute:

7:00 → rotate motor → release kibble.

A $3 digital alarm clock can remember the time during an internet outage.

Your microwave does not contact a data center before allowing you to heat soup.

A mechanical timer does not need authentication.

But a modern smart device is increasingly designed around a different priority.

The company must be able to see it.

The company must be able to measure it.

The company must be able to update it.

The company must be able to control it.

And if achieving that requires turning a perfectly functional local appliance into a peripheral attached to somebody else's server, apparently that is considered progress.

The result is a strange inversion.

You bought the feeder because you wanted control over feeding your cat remotely.

The architecture was built because the company wanted control over the feeder remotely.

Only one of those two control systems appears to be considered essential.

When the cloud disappears, the product does not gracefully become a dumb feeder.

It becomes a very expensive bowl with a login problem.

Conclusion

If your product's primary job is keeping an animal fed, the animal should rank slightly higher in the system architecture than telemetry.

A smart feeder that cannot feed without corporate infrastructure is not an autonomous appliance.

Think about deep shit

Eat pussy

Wright poetry

drink gin

Dream deaply

it helps me pay for:

- bottom surgery

- laser hair removal

- college

it also gives me more time to devote to:

- my writing

- Transfem Voices Project

- development of my game, Enter the Wyrm, which is playable now for free in open alpha!

thank you 🫶

We are currently appealing the decision about our family union. With the documentation we have, we, to my knowledge legally have the right to live in denmark together. However I do not trust the state to uphold the actual laws set by the UN.

Because of this, we are in dire need of funds. Both for the likely upcoming legal battle for us to have a life together. But also for the deposit needed for the unification to begin with.

So we have remade our fundraiser due to it only getting one donation for half a year.

Currently we have about a third of the 10000 usd we need, we've gotten this far mostly due to donations from you all so far

new monthly reward on my patreon, i am doing monthly board game reviews, the first one i've chosen is Gloomhaven, i just finished an over year long campaign, here are my thoughts, if you're interested, my patreon is $5 a month

Word already had a word count?! That WORKED?