weirdo

does anyone know where sanji keeps the key to the fridge

i do. but i will not tell

we bought a shirt at a thrift store that says "best mom in louisiana" for some reason (as a reminder we are in midwest germany) and now my spouse keeps walking around the house wearing it and saying shit like "WHO STANDS BEFORE THE GREATEST MOM OF LOUISIANA?"

why are all of my burger king chicken nuggets shaped like Es.

where are they getting these numbers btw like FUCK NO MOM im SINGLE because 1/67 of my generation got aborted in the GREAT ABORTION

getting lost in boston is fun because I turned around on a street corner three times and some guy yelled "hey stupid! the bus is that way!" very helpful interaction and accurate insult, 10/10 no notes

one time I walked around a building a couple times looking for a bathroom and this guy went "this bitch thinks she's on a merrygoround, where the fuck are you tryna go? bathroom? one floor down to the right behind the door that says bathroom."

My very first time in Boston. I was absolutely miserable, trying to drag my giant suitcase up a lengthy set of stairs in the pouring rain. This guy who had already reached the top looked back at me with the most pure expression of disgust I’ve ever seen in anyone’s eyes, marched back down the stairs, grabbed my suitcase, carried it to the top, left it there for me, and walked away without ever saying a word. I think about him often.

Every time I see this post someone has added a new roundup to it. So I just have to keep reblogging it. What a tragedy. Anyway,

first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go

forgive me father for i have zoomed in on some images

i think i deserve a little treat for surviving the consequences of my own actions