TheImfamousBitch

"wtf is an egg laying kink?" my friend... I don't know how else to tell you this.... but it is all quite literally in the name

look at me. look me in my eyes. there are brave souls out here contemplating the eroticism of greasing a bike chain. we can't be gawking at every kink this side of light spanking or we'll be here all day

back in my undergrad I heard my 19 year old roommates tittering about sexy halloween costumes and ribbed condoms. one of them thought I was some kind of pervert bc I knew what furries were. they didn't even know what knotting was

This is a message for Paul, 25 yo, who has his mom come do his laundry weekly: your mom's friend is roasting the fuck out of you at this sushi restaurant bro

my uh, close internet friend broke up with his girlfriend over financial things but the more he describes it the more i think its insane he ever stayed. She wanted to be engaged before they even moved in with each other, no prenup, she's 60k in debt, he has like 100k in assets, she's a Divorce Laywer. Can you imagine getting rushed into marriage by a divorce lawyer. lmao.

Taylor Swift and that football player broke up??? She's been seen with a new guy too??? Some racer???

saddest thing that can happen is a cat so delicately and cozy putting their small apple head on your leg like a pillow to sleep while fully unaware that in like five minutes you're going to get up to go eat because they don't know human language or how time works

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person