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sometimes i be saying im gonna go to bed and then i dont go to bed. frequently in fact. this is because i have the heart of an optimist and the soul of a liar

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!! AHH AHHHHHH !!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHH !!!!!! AHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !! AAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAAHHHHH !! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!! AHHH !! AHHHHHH !!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH !!!!! AAAAAAH !!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!! !! AHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!! AAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAHHHHH AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH !!!

Look everyone's adding tags to the post about cigarettes being sexy and weed being unsexy trying to explain it but the answer is simple: weed is a lame as hell drug. It's a fun drug! It's an enjoyable drug! But it's a lame as hell drug! It has negative cool factor. You're smoking a fuckin doobie? That's the best you got?

Any setting where the elves have weaker booze than the dwarves isn't committing to the bit

Look, there's this weird thing people do with high fantasy where they want elves to be immortal/extremely long-lived snooty aristocrats and also somehow incapacitated by imagining the taste of salt too hard. "Orcs and dwarves have the hardest booze" no they don't, they have work in the morning! In any of these settings, elves would pregame harder than hobbits party and everyone else has shit to do tomorrow.

The average high elf builds up the drug tolerance of a mid-70s Hollywood producer and then spends three centuries studying alchemy. While humans seek immortality, the Immortals seek the elusive "philosopher's cocaine."

Elf Fentanyl works exactly the way cops think human fentanyl does

Fentanyl is an elf name if there ever was one

It's easy to think "nobody in the whole wide world cares about me" on an empty stomach but try doing it while eating Vegetables and Rice. Seems less convincing now doesn't it? That's simply the power of Vegetables and Rice..

i can't move past Louis' "A message to you Liam if you’re listening" and Zayn's "Liam, I have found myself talking out loud to you, hoping you can hear me" because there was STILL SO MUCH left unsaid.

Mutuals I’m doing this to you