Life is soup, I am fork

Aha guess who might be shifting to fine arts

Got to see Hadestown for the first time ever today (and it was amazing oh my god I had no idea what I was missing) and I'd just like to give a shout out to the poor soul in the audience who had clearly never heard the myth of Orpheus before, because when Orpheus turned around at the end the audience was dead silent except for this one very audible gasp of "no!" from somewhere in the crowd. And after Euridyce was gone and Orpheus dropped to his knees in grief, all anybody --cast, audience, the uncaring gods, etc -- could hear was muffled weeping from the same person

not now sweetie mommy’s blogging about something that 5 people care about

Reminder also that their definition of "radical left" is primarily people who are accepting of gender identity, desire any tightening of even one gun regulation, want to combat police corruption in any way, and don't want a border wall.

Okay this is a BRILLIANT illustration of how the fast fashion industry devours literally everybody it touches, but knowing what I know about models, I'm willing to bet these people JUMPED at the chance to look exactly as they feel on a bad day on the runway and not be fired for it.

use more olive oil

I didn’t even notice the url I was just like damn they’re right.

Your mom finding her friend at a store is like unskippable cutscenes

The fucking worst is that as I get older i completly understand the interest to catch up an unreasonable long time because turns out adults just dont get enough time to hang with friends, so catch up next to the Aldi cheese aisle it is

you can see the increasing age of tumblr users, these posts are like tree rings.

lord the peasants are so loud today

pheasants. PHeasants. The birds

hate it when I'm eating and my stomach starts growling

if you could wait a fuckin second man big changes are coming I promise

clicker training but its just a single piano key that makes you sad

Ain’t this what MCR did to a bunch of 2010s emos

due to inflation you must answer my riddles five

due to budget cuts i will grant you two wishes

due to recent layoffs there is only one of me and I lie 50% of the time

I hate it when I talk wistfully about the ancient world and then people are like “you wouldn’t survive back then” yeah obviously I would die immediately but do you think achilles would be able to survive in the modern world if he had to send one polite email? no