a fuckin unicorn

Kelly pauses in her inventorying of the photo-synth plates she’ll be installing after today’s cycle ends. “It’s just Kelly, hellot-Halzar, you don’t have to acknowledge my species every time we talk.” She smiles. “That’s not considered rude for us.”

“Very well hu—Kelly. Erm. May we have a moment of your time?” Many eyes blink earnestly at her.

“Sure. What’s up?”

hellot-Halzar considers. “May we discuss the structural nature of the ship interior and gravity-derived reference values at a later date? At this moment we would like to inquire as to the nature of your corporeal change.”

“Yeah sure—wait my what?”

“There is a mess hall wager.”

“About my –?”

“Concerning your strands,” hellot-Halzar says, gesturing.

“My….hair.” Kelly runs a hand through it. It’s purple as of two ship days ago. “Ok?”

“We wish to know whether the colour change signifies mood, nutritional intake variance, or ….erm….whether your mating season status has changed.”

“My mating season status, huh?” Kelly lifts an eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Did Jerry put you up to this?”

“Human-Jerry refused to answer our questions about your strands, citing some phenomenon known to your homeworld as ‘famine in missed eek’.”

Kelly snorted. “Tell Jerry he can shove his archaic ideas about ‘feminine mystique’ where M-series stars don’t shine. As for your bet: sorry, it’s none of the above. I changed my hair because my last box of dye was about to expire and because I felt like it.”

hellot-Halzar considers. “chinret-Zer wins then, by technicality: that reason falls within acceptable parameters for ‘mood’.”

“I suppose it does.” Kelly pauses. “Who bet on the ‘mating season’ one?”

“Hmm?” hellot-Halzar had already turned to go and deliver the verdict. They turn one set of eyes back. “Oh that would be Drannuc. He said he smelled a difference in you.”

“Delightful,” Kelly says, instead of explaining menstruation and how that can affect mood, diet, and that technically it correlates to what most of the species on the ship would consider a mating season. “Next time, instead of betting, maybe just ask questions? And not Jerry. He’s a jerk.”

“Reclassifying human-Jerry as jerk-Jerry. We will approach you with all human queries from now on,” hellot-Halzar says and then continues on their way.

i went to the local shakespeare festival (and by local, i mean on the other end of the state) and during the day i convinced my mother to go hiking with me because we were in the center of like four national parks

so we end up hiking this trail that sort of jack-knifes down the mountain and I end up climbing partway up a tree on the edge of the trail to see further out, so my smartass mother asks “legolas, what do your elf eyes see?”

and i, in my smarmy glory, go “they’re taking the hobbits to isengard!”

which is funny enough as is, but then the entire mountainside of hikers hidden in the trees goes “THEY’RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD-GARD-GARD-GARD-GARD! THE HOBBITS, THE HOBBITS, THE HOBBITS, THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD, TO ISENGARD!”

The government’s recent loss in the Supreme Court means that it it can’t now take Britain out of the EU without consulting Parliament. Legislation to trigger Article 50, the provision that allows a country to leave the EU, has been drafted and put before Parliament. The process of this makes it way through the House of Commons and the Lords is complicated but one small thing you can do right now is to call or email your MP and encourage them not to vote for this legislation. Some Labour MPs have already indicated that they will not vote for the legislation; two shadow ministers have resigned because they refuse to; the Lib Dems and SNP have indicated that they will also oppose. The vote is scheduled to take place on Wednesday evening. 

You can find your MP by entering your postcode into theyworkforyou.com, which will also give you an email address for them. Here’s an email script you can use:

Daily small actions to make a better world. UK-based, global in scope.

What is this about?

Each day, we tweet/post on Facebook one small, manageable thing that you can do to make the world a better place. The Twitter is HERE. The Facebook is HERE.

Do you post your daily actions on Tumblr?

No, right now the Tumblr is a place to gather resources, such as scripts for calling representatives, lists of good organisations to support, and other helpful information. We’ll be working on that in the next few days and weeks, and adding to it periodically.

What do you mean by “make the world a better place”?

For us, that means fighting discrimination and injustice on all axes, pushing back against anti-immigrant and anti-refugee sentiments in the media and public discourse, resisting the normalisation of right-wing extremism and white supremacy, and working so that the world is safer, kinder and better for everyone.

We’re based in the UK, and the actions we suggest will reflect that, but many of them will be global in reach and applicable on a wider scale.

Should I do the thing every day?

If you can, that’s incredible, but it’s not realistic for everyone to participate every single day. Some of the actions will involve making financial contributions, expending social energy, or giving time. Not all of those are in everyone’s reach, but hopefully there is enough variety of actions that everyone can do something, some of the time.

The idea is not that you should participate every day - it’s that, if you find yourself with enough energy to spend a few minutes doing one small thing, you can add your voice to the voices of everyone else doing the same thing. We’re hoping that this will give each day’s action a wider impact than if everyone had done it separately.

And if you can’t do the day’s action, you can always signal boost, raise awareness by talking about it with your friends, family and colleagues, or do some reading to learn more.

Shouldn’t we be trying to do more than just a few minutes each day?

You are the best judge of how much you can do. We absolutely encourage our followers to engage in other forms of activism. This is just one little account sharing a few ideas.

Can I do the thing on a different day?

Yes, if you want to read back and do previous days’ actions, feel free!

Can I suggest an action to you?

President Obama, aka the Dad Joke POTUS, just released the most glorious seven minutes of bad Thanksgiving puns you’ve ever heard

President Obama explained that after last year, his daughters decided they couldn’t put up with his dad jokes, so he was joined at the pardon by his adorable two nephews! President Obama is clearly letting his full nerd hang out now. (Yes he cran!) The full video of jokes is truly worth the click.

Gifs: whitehouse.gov

Time to cleanse the palate with a bit of positive relationship analysis!

One of the tropes that plagues, and has plagued, romance fiction ever since the invention of the novel is the idea of female consent not being necessary as long as the male is desirable and/or really wants her. Often, the heroine will succumb either to her own desires or his, whether she is entirely willing to do so or not, and that is framed as being analogous with passion—even love.

Well, two hundred years before Fifty Shades of Grey played fast and loose with consent issues, I present to you the antithesis of this trope in Mr. Darcy of Pemberley.

Elizabeth Bennet, the heroine of Pride and Prejudice, receives two proposals of marriage that are eerily similar, despite the outward differences of her two suitors. Mr. Collins and Mr. Darcy both spring unexpected and unwelcome proposals of marriage on her, calling to light her family’s lack of financial security and connection, seeing themselves as condescending to offer for her, and being completely perplexed by her refusal to accept them.

Elizabeth to Collins: You could not make me happy, and I am convinced I am the last woman in the world who would make you so.

Elizabeth to Darcy: I had not known you a month before I felt that you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry.“

Elizabeth’s words leave no ambiguity for either gentleman: she soundly rejects them both in a similar fashion. From this, readers may infer that since Darcy and Elizabeth end up together, it is Darcy who is persistent in his romantic intentions after Elizabeth has said “no.” But in fact, it is Collins who refuses to take no for an answer, and Darcy who never oversteps his bounds.

The first thing Collins says after he hears her rejection is that she cannot be serious in her refusal. 

 "I am not now to learn,” replied Mr. Collins, with a formal wave of the hand, “that it is usual with young ladies to reject the addresses of the man whom they secretly mean to accept, when he first applies for their favour; and that sometimes the refusal is repeated a second or even a third time. I am therefore by no means discouraged by what you have just said, and shall hope to lead you to the altar ere long.”

So elevated is his own sense of self-worth that she has to explain to him that she did, in fact, mean what she said:

  “Upon my word, sir,” cried Elizabeth, “your hope is rather an extraordinary one after my declaration. I do assure you that I am not one of those young ladies (if such young ladies there are) who are so daring as to risk their happiness on the chance of being asked a second time. I am perfectly serious in my refusal.”

What is the result? Collins still doesn’t take no for an answer, again:

  “Were it certain that Lady Catherine would think so,” said Mr. Collins very gravely – “but I cannot imagine that her ladyship would at all disapprove of you. And you may be certain that when I have the honour of seeing her again, I shall speak in the highest terms of your modesty, economy, and other amiable qualifications.”

  “Indeed, Mr. Collins, all praise of me will be unnecessary. You must give me leave to judge for myself, and pay me the compliment of believing what I say.”

And again:

  “When I do myself the honour of speaking to you next on this subject, I shall hope to receive a more favourable answer than you have now given me; though I am far from accusing you of cruelty at present, because I know it to be the established custom of your sex to reject a man on the first application, and perhaps you have even now said as much to encourage my suit as would be consistent with the true delicacy of the female character.”

  “Really, Mr. Collins,” cried Elizabeth with some warmth, “you puzzle me exceedingly. If what I have hitherto said can appear to you in the form of encouragement, I know not how to express my refusal in such a way as may convince you of its being one.”

And again:

   "You must give me leave to flatter myself, my dear cousin, that your refusal of my addresses is merely words of course. My reasons for believing it are briefly these: – It does not appear to me that my hand is unworthy your acceptance, or that the establishment I can offer would be any other than highly desirable. My situation in life, my connections with the family of De Bourgh, and my relationship to your own, are circumstances highly in my favour; and you should take it into farther consideration that, in spite of your manifold attractions, it is by no means certain that another offer of marriage may ever be made you. Your portion is unhappily so small, that it will in all likelihood undo the effects of your loveliness and amiable qualifications. As I must therefore conclude that you are not serious in your rejection of me, I shall chuse to attribute it to your wish of increasing my love by suspense, according to the usual practice of elegant females.“

   ”I do assure you, sir, that I have no pretension whatever to that kind of elegance which consists in tormenting a respectable man. I would rather be paid the compliment of being believed sincere. I thank you again and again for the honour you have done me in your proposals, but to accept them is absolutely impossible. My feelings in every respect forbid it. Can I speak plainer? Do not consider me now as an elegant female, intending to plague you, but as a rational creature, speaking the truth from her heart.“

And again:   

“You are uniformly charming!” cried he, with an air of awkward gallantry; “and I am persuaded that, when sanctioned by the express authority of both your excellent parents, my proposals will not fail of being acceptable.”

In fact, Collins only stops pursuing Elizabeth when her father puts his foot down and backs her refusal. Pride and Prejudice is a comedy, and so the tone is light on the surface, but beneath the satire is a very real, earnest desire to communicate how often women’s words—even their consent—are dismissed as fickle or inconsequential. Seeing our heroine not fleeing dramatically from a villain, but pursued by an entitled man who doesn’t take her words seriously, we feel Elizabeth’s sense of outrage and how belittling it is for Collins to act this way.

By contrast, though we might imagine a love interest like Darcy to be overcome with passion and try to make her his own by any means, Darcy is remarkably restrained and respectful without ever losing his ardent love for the woman he wants to marry. The first divergence of his response from Collins’ occurs right after he has been rejected:

   "And this is all the reply which I am to have the honour of expecting! I might, perhaps, wish to be informed why, with so little endeavour at civility, I am thus rejected. But it is of small importance.“

The wording here is important. He doesn’t demand that she explain why she rejected him, but rather why she was so impolite about doing so (since he has no knowledge of her dislike of him). He continues to be honest about his objections to her family’s behavior and place in the world, and to be angry at her for defending the duplicitous Wickham, but he never tries to convince her that she was wrong in rejecting him, even though he still views her as a social inferior.

After their heated conversation, Darcy leaves with an apology that he has occupied her for so long:

   "You have said quite enough, madam. I perfectly comprehend your feelings, and have now only to be ashamed of what my own have been. Forgive me for having taken up so much of your time, and accept my best wishes for your health and happiness.”

This is a far cry from Collins following Elizabeth around after the proposal and trying to go over her head to her parents for support.

But wait—doesn’t the love interest write Elizabeth a letter, convincing her to give him another chance?

No. Both Darcy’s letter and its method of delivery are respectful of Elizabeth’s boundaries and her refusal of him.

It should be noted that an unmarried gentlewoman receiving letters from a man she was not engaged to resulted in scandal if it were ever exposed. If Darcy had wanted to compel Elizabeth to marry him, he would only have had to deliver the letter publicly, or through the post. Instead, he delivers the letter in person, when they are alone in a park and there is no chance of discovery. It is still a bit of a risk, though, and so he asks (not demands) that she read it:

“Will you do me the honour of reading that letter?“

Right from the beginning, Darcy reassures Elizabeth that he is not trying to impose on her or get her to accept him after she has made her wishes clear:

 "Be not alarmed, madam, on receiving this letter, by the apprehension of its containing any repetition of those sentiments or renewal of those offers which were last night so disgusting to you. 

While it is more than apparent that her rejection stung and he is still in love with her, he never brings up the subject of the proposal again—the contents are a defense of the charges she had laid against his character, as well as a warning against Wickham for her own safety. He doesn’t ask for a second chance or demand she reconsider her words, even in light of this new information. Moreover, he trusts her with the knowledge of his sister’s near-elopement with Wickham (which could cause a scandal if discovered), thus risking as much by delivering the letter as Elizabeth does by accepting it. In every way, he trusts her judgment and keeps her wishes in mind.

When they meet again at Pemberley, Darcy is trying to reform his behavior. He is cordial to her tradesman uncle and aunt, and has divested himself of the haughtiness that prevented her from seeing his true worth initially. Darcy does not give himself permission to pursue Elizabeth as a result of this change in character; it is only after they have met and talked cordially that he asks her, not to speak with him alone, but to meet his sister. In fact, he resists making romantic overtures for the duration of the visit, which ends abruptly when Elizabeth discovers her sister’s elopement with Wickham. And even there, when she and Darcy are accidentally alone during her distress, he makes no move to use the occasion as an excuse to “comfort” her with his advances. His reaction is, in fact, quite the opposite:

 "I am afraid you have been long desiring my absence, nor have I anything to plead in excuse of my stay, but real, though unavailing, concern.”

Another opportunity arises for Darcy to compel Elizabeth to marry him, this time out of gratitude. Unable to see Elizabeth so wretched, he finds Lydia and Wickham in London and, at great expense, convinces them to marry. He saves not only her sister’s reputation but that of her entire family. Yet rather than use that as an example to Elizabeth of what a good person he is, he forbids her aunt and uncle from mentioning that it was he who saved the Bennets’ good name. Elizabeth doesn’t even know he was involved until Lydia thoughtlessly gives the game away (after she, too, was sworn to secrecy).  

How then, do Lizzy and Darcy get together? It is Elizabeth herself who gives Darcy a reason to believe her opinion of him has improved. During a verbal duel with Darcy’s formidable aunt, she comes out the winner and point-blank refuses to give Lady Catherine a promise not to pursue Mr. Darcy. Lady Catherine petulantly tries to cut the problem off at the source by relating everything to her nephew. It works about as well as you’d expect.

 But, unluckily for her ladyship, its effect had been exactly contrariwise.

   "It taught me to hope,“ said he, “as I had scarcely ever allowed myself to hope before. I knew enough of your disposition to be certain, that had you been absolutely, irrevocably decided against me, you would have acknowledged it to Lady Catherine, frankly and openly.”

What prompts Darcy to renew his offer of marriage is nothing more or less than evidence that Elizabeth had seen his change of heart and accepted it.

“You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once.My affections and wishes are unchanged; but one word from you will silence me on this subject for ever.”

Almost everything matters!

I’m starting to get tired of this leftist habit of declaring things irrelevant.

On second thought, this deserves its own post.

I’m tired of leftists saying that any policy which doesn’t fix everything doesn’t matter.

“A female President will still bomb people!” “A stronger social safety net won’t stop corporate greed from consuming everything it can!” “Gay marriage won’t end transphobia!” “More black representation in movies won’t solve racism!”

A stronger social safety net may not stop corporate greed from consuming everything it can, but it will effectively limit what corporate greed can consume, and help people whose livelihoods have been eaten.

Gay marriage might not end transphobia, but it will undermine hostility to gender nonconformity and assist many trans people in getting to marry or getting to stay married, by not making everything dependent on their legally-recognized gender.

More black representation in movies won’t solve racism, but it’ll give black people a better reflection of themselves and get white people used to seeing black people in places (the hero, the enjoyable antihero, the fan-favorite antagonist) they’re used to only seeing other white people, and that will affect how they’re equipped to see black people in real life.

I’m all about friendships between women, and I love SF&F, so I thought I’d make a little rec list of some of my favourite SF&F books that contain a central or significant girl friendship.

Feel free to reblog with your own recs if there’s something good I’ve missed!

The Steerswoman Series, Rosemary Kirstein – This series has one of my favourite friendships of all time, in any medium. Rowan is a Steerswoman (a sort of travelling scholar) and Bel is a warrior-bard, and they travel together, searching for the truth. Their friendship – the central relationship of the series – is rich and loving, growing and deepening over the course of the series as together they slowly unravel a world-changing mystery.

Mars Evacuees, Sophia McDougall – Pragmatic Alice Dare and science genius Josephine Jerome meet on the ship that’s evacuating them to Mars, and their friendship grows over the course of a terrifying Martian adventure that tests them to their limits. I love friendships where the strengths and weaknesses of the friends complement each other, and watching Alice and Josephine work together to save the day makes me happy deep in my soul.

Vows and Honor series, Mercedes Lackey – Brought together by fate, Tarma and Kethry swear a joint oath to the Goddess to fight evil together, after which they roam the land saving the day and fighting the patriarchy. They come from very different cultures – Tarma is a swordswoman from a nomadic people, and Kethry is a noble sorceress fleeing a forced marriage – but they’re amazing quest buddies with a close and affectionate relationship that’s a joy to read.

Discworld Series, Terry Pratchett – I love all the Discworld novels, but the books focusing on the Lancre witches are my favourites, and the friendship between Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg is a huge part of that. Their decades-long association means that they know each other almost better than they know themselves, and when they work as a team, applying their very different strengths, they are unstoppable.

The Lynburn Legacy, Sarah Rees Brennan – The friendship between intrepid girl reporter Kami Glass and nap-loving misanthrope Angela Montgomery is loving, bantersome and compelling. Its depth and importance is explored thoroughly, even when they’re juggling romances and magical battles. It’s also wonderful to see them make room in their lives for new friend Holly Prescott – Holly’s never had female friends before, and it’s incredibly sweet to watch her relationship with Kami and Angela develop.