The Lightning-Speed Waltz

*Google searches "thank you meaning" before saying "thank you" just in case I've been mistaken about it this whole time*

none pizza with left beef

It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef

ive missed you

#THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos)

I love None Pizza with Left Beef.

3th time i’ve reblogged this

"not to be that guy, but" im gonna stop you right there buddy. no one is allowed to be that guy. no one is allowed to be ANY type of guy. firing squad.

very disappointing when someone says "the bird app" and for one lovely moment I think they are talking about Merlin Bird ID by Cornell Lab, the free app that allows you to identify birds by appearance or sound, make a list of birds you have seen, and explore all the birds native to your region.... and then I realize they are talking about twitter.

who thinks 👍 is passive aggressive i read it as an old timey mobster going "on it boss"

Whenever I use thumbs up I'm sticking my hand out from under a pile of rubble, too exhausted to speak, but signalling I'm okay

I’m tapping the feed to acknowledge the message like Murderbot

I use 👍in text exactly how I use it in meatspace: I concur in a way I am too autistic to put into words worth you consuming. "This response could have been an emoji" ass conversations you know. Say less 👍

Fun fact: the DC area will be hotter than 99% of the earth tomorrow!

It's not global climate change, it's someone who just really hates Trump so much they changed the earth's entire climate. Christ.