Trust The Magenta Madman

but important to point out that this

item: safety pin wings

total cost: ~$4

Tkhorm, a huge black beast and my old good friend, walks in the sunset field ~

every month or so, a thick, glossy, full color catalogue lands in my mailbox, full of dentist chairs, dentist lamps, dentist tables and dentist art to put on the walls of your dentist waiting room.

(the catalogue makes for a great bird toy, my babies take at least a week to reduce it to shreds.)

i've received ads full of smiles full of teeth, addressed to doctor and doctor so and so. they just keep coming and i'm too exhausted to do anything about it.

thing is, it was just something funny, a cute anecdote. look at my new dentist catalogue! i'll order the reclining chair on page 24, the one that costs 8000$, it would look cute in the living room.

and then earlier tonight (around 3AM, yes i was awake) a pipe of our dishwasher decided to disconnect. (yes we'd just started a load, our upstairs neighbor is deaf, no guilt whatsoever, when you're depressed most of the time you clean when the energy comes and sometimes it's on friday night 3am)

anyway. it's earlier tonight, at 3h15 AM, that I found myself in front of the fuse box in the basement, water cascading around me, panicking, trying to find the kitchen switch to turn off everything electric

and.

the switches were labeled.

dentist lamp 1

dentist lamp 2

x-ray

waiting room

dentist lamp 3

..

oh. oh no.

why might op have said that she wanted to choose a word with "more 'reasonable' mispronounciations"? what could the quotes around "reasonable" indicate? why did she say mispronunciations instead of pronounciations?

op writes that the post "backfired" and now "half the people on this post think i actually pronounce it like this." what might the word "backfired" mean in this context?

Time traveler who always is running into these other people who seem to know what's going on or what will happen and is so happy he can finally share his travel stories.

Precognitive who is relieved he isn't the only one with the gift and who is glad to get help averting future disasters.

Mind reader with a horrible memory who tries to stay on top of things by skimming surface thoughts. You want to talk about next week's election results and how they changed the next decade? She's with you.

Mind Reader is standing in the middle of the park, sweating. They do not know why they're here, and obviously none of the people around them do, either. The truth is, they were on their way to the grocery store and got lost and then forgot. It happens.

But, then, they see Precog on a bench and Precog is thinking of them, because Precog had a vision of meeting Mind Reader here today. Of course, Mind Reader thinks, they were here to see their friend! They sit down next to Precog. Precog knows Mind Reader's name. Mind Reader can pick up Precog's name. They have a long and stimulating conversation, like they've known each other forever, courtesy of mind reading and future seeing. Precog assumes this is because Mind Reader also foresaw this. About halfway through, Precog starts finishing Mind Reader's sentences before they say them, and Mind Reader is picking up thoughts like 'it's wonderful to meet someone with the same abilities as me.'

They part ways with a promise to meet again for a coffee/rube-goldberg-esque prevention of a kidnapping.

.

Normal Guy is just walking home from a Revolutionary War reenactment. They see Time Traveler walking the same way, also dressed in old-timey clothes.

"Oh, hey," they say, "were you just at the battle of such and such?"

"Why, yes," says Time Traveler, "did you also come from [year]?"

"You could say that! Do you live around here?"

"I do, for the moment. We should get lunch sometime and talk about yesteryear!"

"Sounds like a plan!"

.

Precog encounters Time Traveler for the first time while breaking in to the corporate offices of a fabulously corrupt company. As in, they are both breaking in, and for the same reason. Thing is, Time Traveler has 'seen' Precog before! Precog thinks Time Traveler means 'seen' as in vision, but, nope!

Turns out that in the future, Precog foresees that Time Traveler needs some help with something similar, makes a lot of 'seeing the future' jokes that the Time Traveler misinterprets, and doesn't register that his old friend doesn't recognize him at all, because, hey, Mind Reader reacts to him in the same way whenever they meet up!

.