James

I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.

Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."

Every year Tumblr holds its sexy people contests. And as a result controversial figures around the world seem to die. I purpose we sacrifice Donald Trump for this years contests.

My hope is tomorrow I wake to the notification of this post rebloged with Apollos dodge ball.

Same

we all know Jesper would pick at his acne and y'all need to draw him with those acne scars I swear

Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the TIME to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the hocus focus to write their fanfiction.

Reblog to give prev the energy to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the executive function to write their fanfiction

Reblog to bully people who don't like female characters or women in general off the internet.

next soc book/novella should be jesper and wylan figuring out how they can have their wedding without public suspicion when the guest list consists of the queen of fjerda and her husband, a random fjerdan guard, living saint dragon queen who just ended a war with fjerda, the dragon queen’s consort who was the former king of ravka, one of the grisha triumvirate of ravka who is also a famous tailor, an infamous gang leader and crime boss who owns all the best known clubs in Ketterdam, the son of the man who invented jurda parem, and an urban legend pirate queen vigilante who’s Ketterdam’s most wanted.

Jesper: Everytime I get mad the ‘old’ me and the ‘new’ me start arguing about how to handle the situation

Everyone else singing about how sad their lives are in 'just another day' and then Gabe's just off to the side giving his villain monologue.