#dykes4(jackie)pike

if we're not gonna give shane a gun can i at least get one on his behalf

i knowwwwww in my heart ilya would love taking shanes last name and after they have kids referring to their family unit as hollanders. ilya turning around to the backseat like okey hollanders here is plan. we are going to be in and out of costco in thirty minutes. you may choose ONE item each. if we get separated we meet at optometrist. we will get ice creams on the way out as long as everyone is cool and nobody tells dad. hollanders on three.

to go to sleep my husband puts on YouTube videos of this random guy trying to survive in nature and build things out of his surroundings and that’s so shane coded shane puts that shit on and he’s so intrigued and Ilya has to be like no more baby it’s time to sleep and shane is like But I have to know how to build a tent out of logs and branches in case I am stranded in the woods but he’s like falling asleep saying it and Ilya is like sure baby whatever you say and just kisses him on the forehead and turns the tv off cause shane is already unconscious

Oh my goddd it’s been said to death but Ilya is peacocking SO BADDD. Look Hollander we play so well together. See Hollander I can give you physical affection in front of others. Can I call you Shane yet? No? Okay then look Hollander see how good I am with kids. Look at my abs & my ass & my hair when I’m soaking wet Hollander. Please want me back

Do u guys think that sometimes- ilya sits on the couch at the cottage feet to feet with his Shane and looks up from his phone at shane who is on his glasses and smiling down at his phone, its on speaker phone and Yuna and David are asking Shane what they should make for lunch when they come over tomorrow. Shane looks up at catches Ilya’s eyes and rolls his fondly and then Yuna is saying- “oh and tell Ilya that we found that beer he was telling David about last week, the brewery is actually not that far from us and we got some to try together” and Ilya’s heart just aches aches aches and he has to press a hand over it because oh god how on earth did he end up so intensely loved. He fiddles with his necklace and then- he can feel the part of him behind his ribs that is made from Shane, has been that way since birth. The golden string that ties them together.

i just feel like we don't celebrate fingers in his mouth friday like we used to anymore

Hockey is sort of its own dead wife in Heated Rivalry

it’s really really important to me that shane and ilya get to grow old together and their bodies get to grow soft and a bit shapeless and their hair starts to grey and their skin grows thin and starts to sag and maybe shane’s prescription worsens and maybe ilya gets hearing aids down the line and maybe one of them uses a walker, and their bodies aren’t what they used to be. but more importantly, they have the same smile lines around their mouths, the same crinkles in the corners of their eyes. maybe their laughs sound similar, the way laughs often tend to when you spend your life with someone, when your joy is their joy, too. shane a near perfect mimicry of ilya when he says davai, ilya almost indistinguishable from shane when he says jeez. tan lines on their ring fingers. evidence that their lives did intersect, that time did pass, that they did get the future they so desperately wanted. that they lived past the end of their myth, and they did it together.

ilya is such a secret baby; he’s moving countries, he’s captain of two different teams, he’s taking care of his father, he’s having mature conversations with teammates, he’s buying houses, he’s running a charity but the minute he’s with shane he’s whining and moping; “nooo shane im fineeee” when shane takes his temperature and “im not drinking your gross smoothie” and “shaneeee tell me a bedtime story” (mainly as a joke but he loves a story from shane)