Your Transandrogynous Confessions

transmasc is not a synonym for a trans person who was afab

Stop making posts about Men, about Women, and then Theys. We deserve to be called what our gender is, even if some do go by they/them.

all of these things are correct, but it's all many people will ever say, people will derail entire conversations with this, at this point they feel like empty words.

it's an easy way for people to do the barest of minimums and not have to learn more about exorsexism, let alone unlearn their own. they said "nonbinary doesn't have to look like anything" and pat themselves on the back.

Nobody wants to push their limits of comfort to dismantle assumptions and structure that is inherently exorsexist because nonbinary people break the simplicity and attached comfort of having a binary to sort people into. So we just get stuck with these little phrases that at the end of the day don't really mean anything when it comes to actually helping us.

The fact we live in society where I will never have a choice to "pass" or be gendered correctly in day to day life because of the inherent importance put onto gender that seeps into everything doesn't feel better when I get told I don't need to look a certain way to be nonbinary.

Trans men have shared histories with lesbians who have shared histories with bisexual women who have shared histories with ace people who have shared histories with aro people have shared histories with gay men who have shared histories with trans women who have shared histories with nonbinary people who have shared histories with etc etc etc etc etc.

also you are never going to be safe for people for whom english is their second language. if someone clarifies their meaning and apologises and you can't accept that over the original wording then don't bother pretending to be autism friendly.

and like part of my autism is that i become convinced that the way i interpret words is the way that they're meant. my autism is disabling to my communication abilities. i have poor emotional regulation, i jump to conclusions. a lot of my reactions are informed by prior negative experiences. i can and probably have been overly defensive in the past.

and i've been misinterpreted so much and had my words picked over and mocked for saying the wrong things and mocked for being unable to say anything at all and it always feels devastating. it's ironic that the same disability that has me treated poorly would have me react poorly to a similar situation, but that's just how it is.

he proposed to a woman, she said yes. the priest at the church he worked at got suspicious and started digging into his identity, and discovered Magnus was not AMAB.

Magnus was sentenced to 8 days in prison for crossdresser and unlawful proposal (because he was considered a woman, and he proposed to ”another” woman). the chances of survival were slim, due to disease, cold and famine.

we have records of his existence. we know where he was born and where he moved, that he was a musician and the first person that was assigned female at birth to work as a cantor in Sweden. we know he would be considered a trans man in today’s terminology. we know he was sentenced to prison for it, and that the conditions were very harsh and many people died while incarcerated.

If your trans activism stops at trans women, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at trans men, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at gender conforming people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at perisex people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at monogender people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at people who label themselves at all, or at people who label themselves in the way that makes sense, and is not "contradictory", to you, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at white people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at abled and neurotypical people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at thin people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at singlets, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at people whose pronouns you can "respect", you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at medically transitioning people, you're not a trans ally.

If your trans activism stops at trans adults, you're not a trans ally.

Now this surprised me a bit. I don't really know much about 4chan, but I know it's a imageboard-type site full of racists, neonazis and criminals. And, apparently full of LGBTQ+ people, too? Fantastic /sarcasm/.

This made me realize two things:

1- I'm more ignorant of what happens in the online English-speaking queer communities than I thought.