I generally try to keep up with and follow along with what trans women talk about when it comes to transmisogyny but sometimes I get stumped. I’ve seen others say the same that that other asker did. "when young girls are gender nonconforming as children, they are called a tomboy and given until sexual maturity to shape up, but when young boys are gender nonconforming, they are called faggots and immediately and often brutally corrected by their peers." That’s so disconnected from what my experience was, and the experience of all the other trans men I know. I feel like an asshole but I do get annoyed with this black and white view cause I can’t help but think “what experience are you pulling from to say that’s what it’s like for trans men growing up?”. But I don’t want to be a bad ally so I think I may be misunderstanding something or it’s part of a bigger discussion.
yeah I could have mentioned I didn't fully agree with that. I think it's a generalization of the fact that femininity in assumed-boys tends to be punished and sensationalized much worse than masculinity in assumed-girls. consider the difference in stigma between like, girls playing football or hockey and boys doing cheerleading, ballet, etc. femininity in general is much more Marked as such, whereas masculinity is thought of as default and natural. so I think there is an observable difference, but it doesn't mean I think it's super easy for you either
Julia Serano discusses this in Whipping Girl. she splits sexism into two concepts: "oppositional sexism," which is the policing of the boundaries between womanhood and manhood, and "traditional sexism," aka misogyny, the denigration of femininity and womanhood
so a trans woman and a trans man can both be punished for breaking the boundaries of the binary (oppositional sexism), but the trans woman will be additionally punished because she is doing so in a way that is marked feminine (traditional sexism/misogyny)
THIS! My first post here was just about what a useful framework traditional/oppositional sexism is to understanding transmisogyny as compared to more 'general' transphobia.
I also like that it actively puts the focus on the differing facets and motivations behind it. A lot of others I've seen kind of brush past the whole "trans so there will be transphobia and woman so there will be sexism" like WHY DO THOSE THINGS EXIST what is the root cause of transphobia??? It's so concise yet explains so much that I'd never seen put into words before
