I Love You Too

 “Humanoid” can be a vague term when looking at alien/creature cause sometimes it refers to anything that’s upright and loosely has the body plan of a human, and other times people mean literally just a normal ass human with things added on

as long as it has a sensory organ or two and some limbs, it’s humanoid enough as far as I’m concerned.

the bare minimum is that humanoids must be bipedal

And they can’t have feathers

THE WHOLE STORY GUYS

The dog looks so nervous in the school picture

Don’t judge him, you were probably nervous for your first yearbook photo too.  

shut the fuck up bitch

oh wait this is my post

Having suicidal thoughts are just a few cells plotting to kill all their colleagues.

yeah you cute but you stress me tf out

On everyone’s 18th birthday they receive a letter from their future selves. Some receive long messages about their future lovers or messages about changes they would have made. Yours contains nothing but a small list of locations and the words, “NEVER VISIT”.

Long story short: They are restaurants where you would’ve answered the waiter “you too” when they’d asked if you enjoy your meal

the wildest moment of 2017? liam appearing at the BRITs out of nowhere to get the award for 1d instead of simon and have the speech instead of simon, dressed quite casually, looking like he arrived at last minute and saying they’re always going to be one direction 

“Forgive me Father for I have sinned” and “I’m sorry daddy; I’ve been very naughty” are simultaneously saying very similar and very different things.

this is the quality content I wanna see on my dash

- rub the i sides with lemon after you’re done scooping. This will also help preserve the pumpkin

It’s fucking June, at least wait until the fourth of July, you animal.

I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of me disemboweling this pumpkin.

THETA APPLE PIE

English class where you interpret Jaden Smith’s tweets