Why Not

i’m not a christian. but “you cannot serve both god and money” in matthew 6:24 ? yeah, that’s kind of epic.

jesus said eat the rich.

No, He didn’t.  He told rich people to voluntarily give away their money out of the goodness of their hearts.  He never told poor people to go take it from them by force.

yes he did. he told me to take your money specifically you dumb bitch

all of henry viii’s wives deserved better. their husband was a piece of shit and most of them have been made to look like whores or bitches when in reality most of them were in pressured into marry him and suffered abuse at the hands of a monster who was willing to murder and destroy the lives of women he supposedly loved simply to get what he wanted

nothing gives me more pleasure than the fact that the only thing henry viii is known for is the women in his life. his wives, his mother, mary, elizabeth. eat a dick, henry, the women in your life are what made you memorable.

I literally screeched.

Hand jobs and blow jobs are called jobs because they’re tedious and dicks are gross. Going down on a girl is called eating out because it’s a privilege.

I feel like I’m constantly worrying about the next part of my life without realizing that I’m right in the middle of what I used to look forward to