not even psychic paper can lie and say im mature

@lymeandcoconut

#lmaooooo #my fave is that episode of white collar where neil is doing a theft #and the music they play over it is leporello's 'here's the list of all the hundreds of women my boss has fucked' aria from don giovanni #it's supposed to just sound grand and sophisticated but the guy is singing about how DG fucks tall women short women #fat women skinny women princesses and peasants he fucks them all! #and here's the numbers broken down by nationality! #he's fucked over 1000 women in spain you know!

- was the only one to get an A the first grading period. had to stop them from putting me on their shoulders

- became the official classroom mascot on account of i was the only girl. this meant i was an integral stop on any and all workshop tours. was referred to as “Our Lady Helena” on these occasions

- almost set myself on fire once bc my prof stood behind me watching me try a skill he’d just demonstrated and he shouted very suddenly very loudly. restarted my heart and asked WTF WAS THAT FOR JOHN and he called me a “goddamn wonder”. i almost got third degree burned over a compliment

- mentioned offhand ONE TIME that swords were cool. also mentioned my birthday offhand ONE TIME. one of The Guys remembered both instances and also happened to find a sword in a dumpster so he gave it to me for my birthday

- came in fifth in an arm wrestling competition

- french braided my hair in class bc i didn’t have time to do it beforehand. ended up with an audience of like 5+ guys trying to figure out how tf i was doing it

- told The Guys my college friends call me barbie. Mistake. suddenly had all 12 of them calling me Barbarian

- had some down time and made a silly little sculpture with some scraps. The Guys were endlessly intrigued by this and demanded to see some of my art school stuff. had a small crowd around my phone cheering loudly every time i swiped to a new picture

- accidentally mentioned the cafe i worked at. Mistake. several days later all 12 of them came in to bother me

the audience may have watched pin fall apart in episode four, but occtis didn't, he was busy being dead

when i am scrolling on vinted (for you it might be depop or some other second hand clothing app) i avoid these labels/ hashtags (y2k, goth, whimsigoth etc) that sellers self label like the plague. reason being that they are usually 70% of the time up charging the garment to sell you an aesthetic rather than a clothing item that for all intents and purposes should be sold at a lower price given that its pre-owned/worn.

the best way to find great authentic pieces is to look up or search for basic pieces like “leather jacket with asymmetrical straps”, “ black lace top”, “frilly blouse” or “black diy bag” etc and to take your time scrolling, and not “goth bag”, “punk boots”, “cottagecore jacket” - this only gets you overcharged pieces or up charged shien or killstar stuff, no good!

the best pieces are often sold by people who do not have any online label or aesthetic to mark it with, they are just genuine pieces that no longer serve the person selling it. ive found beautiful jackets and shoes on vinted sold by older people who have no reason to charge you an extra twenty bucks on something by giving it a label like vintage y2k blingcore

his son, at this very moment:

Happy anniversary Lawrence and Linda Flynn Fletcher

And happy birthday Vanessa 🎉🥳