nobody numa numas like they used to

"Discourse" is far too dignified a term for the foolishness y'all get up to. We should go back to calling it wank.

Why do they even make apps for ADHD. You want me to use my 24/7 handheld immediate distraction device? To manage my 'gets distracted too easily' disorder? Ooooh we developed the perfect tool for managing your anemia. Its hosted in Dracula's castle. 👍

Picked up my phone to consult my task list for today and now I'm reblogging this instead, case in point

forever grateful i was simply too lazy to let the makeup industrial complex get its hooks in me. I was just like im not doing all of that. in fact. im doing none of that

yeah I have political reasons for it now but my original and still most powerful reason is "I am not getting out of this bed one single second before I have to"

Getting dumped really puts children's cartoon villains into perspective. Like dude you're SO right, love and caring ARE disgusting and we SHOULD cast a spell to drain all human emotion into your amulet.

Or you use a plastic/silicon spatula?? Or a silicon whisk?? go to literally any dollar store they have shitty plastic/silicon kitchen utensils you can scramble eggs with without scratching up your pans

I don't care if they're the highest grossing movies on planet freakin Earth, you say "Avatar" and everyone and their mom still thinks that bald little bitch and his magic cow. Soggy James can keep his millions, he'll never have the streets.

academic dishonesty is not something you can spin as moral lol i do not want to share a career field let alone a social sphere with a bunch of chatgpt using ass bitches

"you're just scared your diploma is going to devalue" i'm afraid you dumb bitches are going to become my colleagues and drag social services to hell

"The assumption that academic dishonesty is okay is rooted in the idea that what you're learning to do doesn't matter."

my whole experience of taylor swift for the past decade has been periodically scrolling past social media posts where people clown on her with parody lyrics like "I was a firetruck and you were a fire / my siren song sparked love's funeral pyre" and then learning over the next ten minutes with the creeping dread of a babysitter hearing noises from the utility room in an 80s slasher movie that they're real it's all real this is who our nation's therapists and HR managers consider to be millennial sylvia plath