Hello, Beloved

Welcome to a sinner’s mind

Where you will find

All that are not kind

Let’s identify a line

Kindness and treachery,

Is there a boundary?

Love and hate,

Is there a fate?

Punishment and sin,

Is there a difference to the eyes of our kin?

None, a difference is in disguise

You and I,

We are misguided

Our own paths are not directed

Yet our paths cross,

Just like our soul’s loss

Lost between love,

and He above

Can’t help it but I’m afraid

it’s like my heart’s trapped in a cage

It wants to love you loudly

As it loves you so devotedly

Oh, where will we meet, my love?

Our paths, it crossed

Yet when will it be in laws

‘cuz my spirit’s a bird trapped in a cage

And yours is a bear who’s lost in the haze

I want to ask you,

Who will it be, my love?

A sinner or He above?

Yet I can’t make you pick

Because even I,

Ako, isang papel na blanko

Sino nga ba ako?

Kung ang mga tao ay kulay

na puno ng ideya’t sarili,

bakit ako may katawang blanko

na walang orihinal na mekaniko?

Ngunit imulat mo

Nang makita ang katotohanan na may mata

Imulat mo!

Nang makita ang kulay na inilagay

Nang makita na ikaw, ako, ay hindi blanko

Aking katawan at isip,

Pinunô ng kulay na ilinagay

Si dilaw na nag turo ng

pagmamahal at pagiging dangal

Si asul, rason ng paggawa ko ng kanta,

Nagturo mag debate ng tama

Hilig sa teatro’t pagsusulat,

Kay lila nakuha

Aking kapare sa kaguluhan,

Si kahel, kanya nakuha ang aking katangian

Ako nga pala si Ponchang,

Makata, Manunulat at Manunula

At Ako ay may katawang blanko

Para sa mga kulay na gusto ako

“Talent’s Wasted”

The fear of not being enough,

So to try and try to be tough.

Chin up, speak loud, look proud, watch the crowd

Confident, like a scout without a vow.

For a second, on top of Mount Everest,

Thousand of heads to watch your success.

Oh get over it.

A voice speaks in your ego of insecurity.

“I’ll prove you wrong, you’re an obscurity”.

2 seconds

Fell from the top and dropped

Scary feeling being seen by no one

Emotion of despair and regret,

Yet you haven’t done anything to regret yet

But now you did.

You proved it right,

“You dumb, inferiority of a rarity”.

Overthinking, the curse of the endless.

Mind, going one hundred miles per second

Mouth, on a centimeter per hour

Oh now, you’re reckoned to be wrecked,

Thousand of heads being in check.

And you’re threatened by the fear of direct pledge,

Forgetting you terrifies

But my soul, it purifies.

You, a poem I need to memorize

with my tearful eyes.

A poem I wrote about You and I,

Only an idea as we are mechanized.

We identify as untrue, an illusion

My imaginary boy, only a delusion.

The real you, a case I have not solved

Yet I have these pieces of evidence involved

Your piercing gaze, our undeniable tension, I craze over

Yet was there Even an ‘our’, or a ‘we’ in this question?

I guess it doesn’t matter,

As the only thing I can do is try and get over

But a wave of realization washed over me recently

My heart you threw and destroyed so neatly

But how can you destroy it if you don’t have it?

A realization, my empty heart, you took

Now I can’t take it back

For the first time I fell in love,

Trapped in this means of life with no meaning

What even is the purpose of our surface?

When life ends just as quickly as it starts

We Humans, just like dust, when compared to stars.

“Live” in this world with no resolutions

What is the purpose life?

Why are we alive?

Unexplainable, since there are just no reasons

Life is Pointless and senseless,

just freedom nonetheless.

Freedom to be happy, freedom to be sad

Free to like stars, to rise bars

To love, to hate

We are dusts, free to just be us.

Now, look at stars, and think about what it’s thinking thus.

Watch the sea, ride the waves.

Paint. Make colors and paper become art, let them gaze.

Realization of everything is purpose,

The Soul of Life.

A guy, A normal guy

Met u In your twenties, I was twelve.

You were like a spell, and I was compelled

Acted like twenty, to make an impression

Somehow you became my safe place,

my perfect dimension.

You gave me attention and reflection,

Taught me direction for deception.

Oh and how I remember of that you would listen

To my stories as a rebel with reckon,

Tales of my life as a high-school student.

With your eyes like tall mountains,

Full of mystery, full of despair

Yet calm like the Sea at nowhere.

But then you left me with no repair

And I try to find you in every boy, I swear.

Nevertheless, another was there,

With the same calm voice and soothing eyes.

He built me once again, made me feel like the top.

Made my life beautiful like apples and flowers,

And then he dropped my heart.

Once again I was left with no repair,

Yearning for petals in my throat,

A love so strong, for you cannot cope.

Beloved, the reason of demise

But this feeling of hope,

despite of the struggle.

Hoping for the inevitable

For Godesses to arise, to empower.

My Sunshine, bring life to our flower

Hope, a gentle faith

As Gods responded to my prayers

Pretty blossoms in my lungs,

Worth it for the two of us.

Now come on Beloved,

Take these petals of our love

…

Hope, a gentle, cruel faith

Felt to empower, made to devour

I’ve never seen growing as cruel

But the sparks gone, so is the fuel.

Pretty flowers gave me Hope,

“Why am I not normal father?”

“My son, you are normal. Why ask?”

“They always make fun of me, called me lackey and crazy and they do these weird things.”

“What things?”. The tone of his voice suddenly changed as the tension seeps into our play time.

“They just randomly make me look at the sun or…or,o-r just flash me with a light. It hurts dad; it fe-feels like being blinded”.

I cant help but stutter as I recall the moments of the unsettling games they did to me, though those games always felt seemingly like torture.

“Hey…you are extraordinary! You are a miracle that we love, a miracle that should be dead. I’m sure they’re just playing games. But believe me, my son, you may not be normal, but you are extraordinary. You will do extraordinary things in this lifetime, create a legacy that your future children will protect and you will bring history to our family. Because you are extraordinary.”

He said, but I am not fooled. I can’t help but feel ordinary with his expectations. I know that I will never ever be capable enough. There will never be a lifetime where I’ll be strong enough to get past this sickness Inside of me to be capable of great things. At least my cousins are a little capable, they are normal unlike me.

Without them, I am just me; no talents, no skills, just a useless burden. I am just too unormal, too ordinary.

Green, a color so full of life

yet it means sadness

The color a stem should be,

But pure darkness covered it slowly.

As I gave you our first flower

A dull one, yet so full of happiness

Covered in those sharp thorns,

Petals just like the night forms,

Overly flourished, ready to get buried.

That rose was out of life,

But I wanted to bring it back alive

Tears of blood, shredded

Us, I try to make mended

A rose out of life I tried to save it

Poured all I had because our flower is worth it.

I planned to bring that rose alive

But still, that rose was out of life.

Just like our fate,

Dead and forbidden,